when no-one's watching

Silly Bandz!

2010-05-27T18:52:00.002-04:00

I ran across an article before checking my yahoo mail today and chuckled: "Silly Bandz Bracelet Craze." Although it may, itself, sound silly, I 100% empathize with the teachers in this article. I've noticed these silly bands becoming more and more popular, especially among the children and students at my church. A few weeks ago, I decided that I'd be the "next coolest teacher" in my school and buy them for my students as potential "prize giveaways." After realizing that 9 and 10 year olds can't quite handle the "class" of these neon colored-animal and beyond-shaped bands, I too "band" them from my classroom on the exact day that I was so confident I'd be starting a revolution. Needless to say, the students' craze for these haven't died, in fact, it's outrageous! (Perhaps that revolutions has infact begun?) I don't know how many more times I can handle hearing, "Can I trade your penguin for a seahorse?"

Silly Bandz Bracelet Craze: School Ban Over Distraction

By BONNIE ROCHMAN Bonnie Rochman – Thu May 27, 2:10 pm ET

The Bandz are now contraband. Schools in several states, including New York, Texas, Florida and Massachusetts, have blacklisted Silly Bandz, those stretchy, colorful bracelets that are creeping up the forearms of school kids across the U.S. And starting this week, all 800-some kids at my son's elementary school in Raleigh, N.C., were commanded to leave at home their collections of rubber band–like bracelets, which retail for about $5 per pack of 24. What could possibly be so insidious about a cheap silicone bracelet?

"It's a distraction," says Jill Wolborsky, a fourth-grade teacher at my son's school, who banned them from her classroom before the principal implemented a schoolwide ban. One student stole some confiscated Bandz from her desk, choosing them over the cash in her drawer. (See pictures of teens in America.)

Students fiddle with them during class and arrange swaps - trading, say, a bracelet with a mermaid for one with a dragon - when they should be concentrating on schoolwork, teachers say. Sometimes a trade goes bad - kids get buyer's remorse too - and hard feelings, maybe even scuffles, ensue.

That's what prompted Karen White, principal of Snow Rogers Elementary School in Gardendale, Ala., in October to become one of the first administrators to forbid students their Bandz. "We try not to limit their freedom of expression and what they wear, but when this became a problem, I knew we had to nip it in the bud pretty quickly," says White, who has since extended an olive branch in the form of monthly Silly Bandz days. (See pictures of a public boarding school in Washington, D.C.)

Silly Bandz are the latest in a long list of kid-centric fads - in the tradition of Cabbage Patch Kids, Beanie Babies, PokÉmon cards and Crocs. BCP Imports LLC, the small business in Toledo, Ohio, that's behind the bracelets, was not prepared for the frenzy. It's increased its workforce from 20 employees to 200 in the past year and just this week added 22 phone lines to keep up with inquiries. The company sells millions of packs a month, and Robert Croak, the president, can still hardly believe it. (He took my call after hanging up with Macy's, which is interested in creating a Silly Bandz float for its storied Thanksgiving Day parade.) (Comment on this story.)

Croak got inspired about three years ago at a product show in China, where a Japanese artist had devised a rubber band cute enough to escape the trash bin. Though Silly Bandz have been out for two years, they began catching on a year ago - Alabama was an early adopter, as were New Jersey and Tennessee. They're just now gaining traction in California and Texas. (See where jewelry is fitting into green designs for 2010.)

"They're getting banned because kids play with them so much," says Croak, who maintains they're the right product at the right time, a cost-conscious trinket in tough economic times that can even be a learning tool for little ones, kind of like flexible flash cards.

His company receives about 500 fan letters a week. One, signed by a 10-year-old named Logan Librett and a few of his friends in New Rochelle, N.Y., suggested a way to circumvent all the bothersome Silly Bandz restrictions: "Some schools in New York have banned them, but we have ideas that might change that ... clear silly bands that teachers can't see and only glow in the dark."

Just in case the company bites, Librett offered his address. He's still waiting.

Spring Fever

2010-04-20T21:21:00.003-04:00

April: "the month of testing," as described by our administration.

Halfway through the month (with only a few more days of Science PSSAs to continue), I notice a DRASTIC change in my students' behavior. Spring Fever is here-even at the age of 10-I can see the hormones blossoming. The girls won't stop giggling over the boys, and the boys just love to "tease" the girls. I feel like it's already June with the way they're acting!It's difficult to get through the day without me mentioning my frustration with their chattiness, disrespect, and overall poor behavior. I've heard of teachers talking about "full moons" when children get crazy, and now, I finally understand the idiom!

I've tried a couple of strategies with the students, including reminding them in the beginning, middle, and at the end of the day, having class talks, behavior incentives, etc. I'm afraid that I'm going to run out of ideas before change can really happen. This is not behavior that I will tolerate with two months of school still left. I'm already so tired of the constant reminders and reprimanding; this is definitely my least favorite part of the role!

Any suggestions on how to help a first year teacher control the "Spring Fever" behavior?

Can You Come Down From the Mountain?

2010-04-15T21:27:00.006-04:00

A close friend of mine recently told me, "I live a life filled of regret and guilt."

How sad. How sad, and yet...how easy. Why is it so easy to fall into a habit of feeling regretful or guilty, especially of those things beyond our own control?

It's been quite a while since I've blogged. Since January, almost four months have passed, and I've missed opportunities to share dozens of teaching stories; those that are encouraging, frustrating, and simply comical. I regret that. Four months have passed and I've missed opportunities to share encourage readers with stories of ministry and better understanding God's word. Why? Laziness. I feel guilty for that.

How sad it is to live a life of regret and guilt.

I don't want to live that life.

For Christmas I gave my dad a devotional that I read in my first year of proclaiming my faith; "My Upmost for His Highest" by John Updike. The devotional is phenomenal, and I knew it was a perfect gift for my father, one who always craves deep and purposeful reflection on scripture. His conversations about the readings have prompted me to re-read the devotional for myself.

Funny how a devotional always seems to be talking to you in the right moment.

Today's read: "Can You Come Down From the Mountain?" The devotional spoke towards the "mountain top" experience and how so often, many of us tend to feel "no good for the everyday world when we are not on the mountaintop." As it speaks to how we must strive to "bring everyday life up to the standard on the mountaintop," it quotes: "Pick yourself up by the back of the neck and shake off your fleshly laziness. Laziness can always be seen in our cravings for a mountaintop experience: all we talk about is our planning for our time on the mountain. We must learn to live in the ordinary 'gray' day according to what we saw on the mountain."

It's time to shake off that laziness. Yes, I must shake off the laziness that prevents me from blogging. But even further, I must shake off my fleshly laziness that prevents me from experiencing a mountaintop moment on a "gray day." If I claim to follow Jesus, I must learn to take Jesus' yoke, and not my own. I must learn to trust Him.

Yesterday while driving to work, it was so foggy, I could barely make out a few hundred feet in front of me. Gray surrounded me. It's easy to be distracted by gray. So many missed events, opportunities, or conversations can evoke regret and guilt. I pray that with the power of God's Holy Spirit that He can drive me to search for the stream of sunshine through the gray; opening up a ray of opportunity to share and experience in His joy and love...even when not necessarily on the mountaintop.

Resolutions and Reflections

2010-01-07T22:34:00.007-05:00

Ah, 2010! A fresh new year, decade, heck- even a census, and once again, an opportunity to set fresh resolutions, accomplish new goals, and look forward a year's worth of adventures!

Although exciting, it's easy to become quickly overwhelmed with "all there is to do" after relaxing for a bit during the Christmas Vacation. (That's even more true for us teachers who are fortunate enough to celebrate with 12 days off from Christmas Eve to after New Years!) Already I have vowed to (once again, for the third year in a row) try and read the whole Bible in a year. (So far, so good!) I've set fitness goals (The wedding's in less than 6 months), professional goals (that's easy as a 1st year), and emotional goals (practice a Sabbath, relax, stress causes wrinkles!).

The New Year also presents a wonderful opportunity for each of us to reflect. We can reflect on our past year; achievements we've accomplished, adventures we'd love to relive, and people who've impacted our hearts. I've had a wonderful 2009. Adam proposed on February 15th. On May 24th, I graduated from Albright. In June, I ventured to the West with my fiance for the first time. In August, I was asked to return to Reading, Pennsylvania as a 4th grade teacher. I've gotten to spend hours rebuilding relationships with my close friends and family. I am so, so grateful.

Many of you know that it's not easy for me to sit and reflect. As a teacher who thrives on multitasking and practicing efficiency for every hour on and off the clock, my profession doesn't help this flaw! Yet, in those few moments when I can embrace silence, moments in the car, right before bed, I can never help but smile at just how fortunate I am. It was just a few days ago, while riding in the car, when I thought-for about the dozenth time, "I absolutely adore my job (more so, the students I get to teach) and I couldn't imagine-nor would I want to imagine-myself anywhere else for this year."

Psalm 37:4
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

And so I realize, I am who I am, I love what I do, because I've been created by a God who loves me a thousand-times more than any reflection of 2009 or excitement for 2010 can bring. Wow. What a God.

It's funny, too. For the most part, I didn't even know what those desires were when making my 2009 resolutions and goals a year ago. Nor, while bumping through the "ups" and "downs" of my 2009 roller-coaster ride, did I realize that later, I'd gratefully reflect on the ride.

I have a funny feeling that I'm in for a similar surprise in 2010

I can't wait for the journey.

Melissa's Urgent Wedding

2009-11-17T20:34:00.003-05:00

One of the greatest rewards of being a teacher is that you'll never know what sorts of surprises your students will "walk in" with each morning! Although only November, my students have flabbergasted me by giving me Eagles blankets, stuffed animals, crackers, apples, jackets, pencils, highlighters, bracelets, etc., etc., etc. (And no, I did not keep all of these things...the jacket was too small!)

It's so interesting how willing these children are to show their love by acts of service, or giving, to me! I always find myself reflecting upon it, and thanking God for reminding me of childlike faith and childlike (genuine) love through them. Humorously though, I even find myself arguing with them sometimes, such as in today's morning conversation:

Teacher: "No, no, YOU keep your sweater, it's yours!"
Student: "...but I want you to have it."
Teacher: "No, really, I appreciate your gift and your kind heart, but that's for you!"
Student: "...but I have more like it at home."

I wouldn't be a teacher, however, if I didn't admit that some of my favorite gifts are those that are academically related to the content that we're studying in school. One of my students in particular often uses her vocabulary words to write very clever stories. I couldn't resist the opportunity to share this one. (The bold words are the vocabulary words that she included.) Enjoy!

Melissa's Urgent Wedding

One day Melissa was rehearsing her play of Romeo and Juliet. Her brother was knocking on the door. He said the neighbor's house was burning down! She grabbed her purse and ran. While she was there she saw a boy. She noticed that he was in her science class. The next day she had to partner up with him. While they were researching, he asked her out. She said yes. On their date he gave her a pearl necklace. On their 4th date, he proposed to her. On their wedding day she got married in a lavender dress. Her hair was curly. When they were getting married she hurried and said yes. On their honeymoon there was new furniture and a baby turtle. On the walls there was a painted mural. They were happy about what got them together.

Tu Comprendes?

2009-11-10T20:32:00.006-05:00

I remember 4th grade.

I remember obsessing over perfect grades; wanting no less than a 100% on everything.

I remember creating a state report on Michigan that lasted over an hour and spanned across two days.

I even remember the name of the cute boy in class that every girl crushed on.

I never remembered the challenge of having to learn a second language; how to speak it, how to spell it, and oh yea, how to understand "algebraic expression" when I'm insecure about how I pronounce "multiplication."

I grew up in a school district in Pennsylvania comprised of predominantly Caucasian students, myself being one of them. Fitting in was no problem. For the most part, we all looked alike. All of our parents made "a decent salary." We all received the hottest Christmas toys and wore the latest trends in clothing. Most of us had been living in the same neighborhoods-heck, the same houses, that we'd lived in since birth. Many of us went to CCD together at the local parishes. Language was never a challenge-we were raised speaking English, we were taught speaking English, and so we thought...in English.

Now a 4th grade teacher myself, I teach in a school district that is predominately populated with Hispanic children. In fact, my district is 76% Hispanic, the largest in the state of Pennsylvania. Here, all children are different. Parents make all sorts of salary ranging from "decent" to "none." Children have similar clothes, but that is because they are mandated a uniform. Students, on average, attend 3-4 different elementary schools between the 1st and 5th grade. Students don't only speak, think, and write in English.

Many are classified as "ELA:" English-learner acquisition students. These students often arrive in the United States from another country (such as Mexico, Puerto Rico, or the Dominican Republic) and face the challenge of enrolling in the grade level equivalent with their age (a 9 year old in 4th grade) with a less than age equivalent English vocabulary.

I never realized the difficulty of learning 4th grade concepts in English with a brain that was raised to think, speak, and write in Spanish.

As I met with my students' parents this week for parent-teacher conferences, I was again reminded of the process many of my students undertake for 6.5 hours a day. These students, when prompted with a question in English, must listen to the teachers' words in English, translate it into Spanish in their mind, think about the answer in Spanish, and then translate it back into English in order to respond. The time necessary to answer a question is nearly double my own personal 4th grade experience.

It's embarrassing how easy it is to forget that oh-so-important fact as a teacher.

"Here I am, teaching these 9 year-olds how to speak, think, and write in a whole new language,"
I thought to myself while sharing report cards with family members. More importantly, however, "Here I am, teaching these 9 year olds how to be confident, determined, and hopeful during this difficult transition."

ELA: Although difficult, challenging, and for many an "added burden" to accommodate such learners, I find special pleasure in providing assistance to such students. In fact, I enjoy it so much, I've added "pursing an ELA certification (and learning the Spanish language)" to my list of future goals, especially within education. I admire my students for their determination, and although many may not realize, am inspired by their bilingual (and sometimes, trilingual) capabilities.

My students continue to teach me more each day.

Wait, Why Do You Divide by 3 Again?

2009-10-14T21:03:00.003-04:00

If there's one thing that I've learned within my first month of teaching, it's that I can no longer be comfortable thinking from the perspective of an adult within the classroom. Time and time again, I've caught myself assuming that my students know more than they actually do (when doing a math problem, for example), only leaving me frustrated because too many confused 4th graders are running towards me, pleading for my assistance.

Perhaps you're reading this and thinking, "well no kidding, Melissa, you are teaching 4th grade! You have to think like a kid!" The concept, however, is easier to "understand" than to actually follow. Try teaching a lesson on finding an average or dividing with remainders! What's the easiest way to to split 25 into 4 groups? Using manipulative's? A multiplication chart? Using a multiply, subtraction, check method? It's easier said than done!

I've learned that it's important that children, regardless of age, are given explicit, clear directions and are taught detailed steps to solve a problem or to complete a task. I've had to accept that I'm going to spend a lot of time giving directions...over and over. Not only do I have to repeat myself several times without loosing patience, I have to remember to truly think like a 4th grader when creating my directions and steps! I never thought I'd admit that it's difficult to think like a kid again!

A Frustrating Day on the Job

2009-09-22T17:27:00.004-04:00

"And when I count down from 5 to 1 you should be in your seats, mouths closed, looking at me. 5...4...3...2...1!"

::Everyone is still talking.::

Today was one of the most frustrating teaching days that I've experienced thus far. It wasn't that anything went terribly wrong or that one of my kids decided to give me attitude, it's just that...my kids are just too darn chatty!

I guess I shouldn't be too surprised: I mean, they do have me as a teacher! I just never imagined how darn frustrating it can be when trying to redirect the students' focus back to me. Regardless, I feel like 60% of what I'm teaching is continuously classroom management.

It's difficult. As a new, young teacher whose ambitions are nowhere short of "saving the world," balancing classroom management with "fun, creative, energetic ideas" is a huge challenge. I want the students to look forward to coming to school. I want them to know that the classroom is a safe place. I want them to experience learning as something fun. But I also want them to view their education as something very serious and meaningful.

Too many kids in the school in which I work have a "why should I care?" or "what difference does school make?" attitude. I want that attitude to change, yet I already fear the stress and burden of "pacing guides" and 4sight testings to keep up with, leaving very little room for creativity, flexibility, and well...fun.

Not only do I find the secret management tactics of whole group teaching tricky, I'm flabbergasted at the little bit of time teachers get to spend one-on-one with students. How can I teach a mini-lesson to a small group of students and have other students on task with completing another task? I find myself struggling to make time just so I can review basic math facts with students who need to review and learn the basic mathematical functions. In fact, I found myself shifting my entire schedule around today just because I recognized a group of students that were really struggling with rounding. (Too bad about pacing guides, these fourth grade students need to know their place value chart!)

It's ironic, though, how teaching can be both so frustrating and so inspirational. As I told my fiance Adam the other night, "each day that I continue to be frustrated, I'm likewise motivated to find new ways to reteach the concept or to retry management ideas. Teaching is such a great challenge, and finding areas that I struggle with motivate me to become better...for the students."

Sometimes I feel like I'm learning more than the students.

My biggest fear, I told my mentor, "is that I hope I'm not postponing the education of my students because of my 'first year goof-ups. The last thing I want is for my kids to enter 5th grade and be clueless."

In hopes of that not happening, it's back to the drawing board for me. How else can I teach place value? Rounding? Prefix? Vocabulary? Writing? Creativity, I need you now!

Keep reading for more classroom experiences!

Life Courses and Childhood Dreams

2009-09-16T22:06:00.003-04:00

I'm always extremely discouraged to "start up" blogging again after I'm well aware when I take a hiatus. It reminds me that I'm extremely "human," not perfect by any means, and oh yes, effected by life's course of changes every now and then.

Nonetheless, here I am, blogging, and I am comfortable to now say that after a nine day road trip from the West Coast back to the East, diving into a first year teaching job the weekend after our return, searching and scoping out wedding venues, caterers. and entertainment, and moving back to Reading all within a short month, I feel like I'm "settling in." (And some people thought that making the transition from being a college student to "going into the real world alone was overwhelming!)

"Life" has surely taken its course in my life.

I suppose I can't be surprised, though. Life is always an adventure for my fiance and I. That's how we like it to view it anyway.

As I lay here in my Reading apartment-and yes, lay-I say lay because my roommate and I literally do not have any living room furniture to sit on yet (oh, that needs to happen, too?), I still cannot relish the reality of my now "school teacher" world. Three weeks ago I had my first "day of school." Monday I had my first "faculty meeting." Tomorrow I have my first "Meet the Teacher" night. The experience still seems to be beyond me. I cannot believe that I, Melissa Jaworski, am largely responsible for the academic progress of 19 students. Really, what was I thinking when I thought that I could have that much responsibility hanging on my shoulders?

Believable or not, being a school teacher is a dream that I've held onto ever since I was five years old. In fact, the day before my "first day of school," I told my mom, "I can't believe that tomorrow I'm going to be the person I dreamed to be since I was five years old."

Now, I'm not saying that I'm going to retire a teacher. I still have a very strong passion for vocational ministry, such as working within a church or for a para-church organization. I very well may decide to not teach after this first year experience. On the other hand, I may decide that I'll continue to teach for a number of years. Nevertheless, it's incredible for me to fathom the reality of fulfilling a childhood dream.

In fact, it gives me even more hope and inspiration for the children that I'm teaching. In 4th grade, I wanted more than anything to be a teacher, and now here I am, a 4th grade teacher.

When I reflect back on my journey towards "becoming a teacher," I'm reminded of all of the different stages that I passed through while remaining committed to my dream; teaching my stuffed animals at 5 years old, filing tests and quizzes for my elementary school teachers, deciding "teaching wasn't good enough for me" at 13, continuing to organize people and tasks in every opportunity available throughout middle and high school, struggling to decide a major in college...only to choose elementary education. I've had a lot of "twists and turns," a lot of changes and "I can't decide" moments, yet always, always, have I had the consistency of a small burning flame within me to...teach.

In fact, my journey reminds me of the well-known scripture in Jeremiah 19:11. It reads:

¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Plans. Isn't it ironic how we, as humans, try so hard to create the "perfect plans"-1 day or 5 year-so that we can follow the steps that we believe lead towards a goal? And isn't it even more ironic, that during all of that time-being 5 and teaching stuffed animals to being 13 and not wanting to teach, to not deciding on a major in college, to getting a teaching job fresh out of college-that God has not forgotten me nor my childhood dream. "It's strange to believe that I'm actually doing the job that I dreamed to do since I was 5 years old."

Life-adventure- has a powerful way of allowing us to experience the faith of God.

Thanks, God...for life. For faith.

(*Note: I do realize that the last "sentence" is actually not a sentence at all, it's a fragment. I just recently taught my 4th graders about the characteristics of a complete sentence.)

Thank You, Arizona! (Not Good-Bye!)

2009-08-05T11:56:00.005-04:00

Adam and I with the most WONDERFUL host family: the Giboneys!

Two and a half months pass quickly when you're pursuing a job you love, conquering "unexplored land", and are surrounding yourself with loving people. Adam and I have thoroughly enjoyed our time here. We can't believe how quickly Thursday, August 6th has approached! Although we'll continue to "road trip," taking pit stops in Texas, New Orleans, Alabama, South Carolina, and Maryland along the way, we'll surely miss the adventures and relationships that we've built here in Peoria, Arizona.

Below are a few quick, fun questions that summarize some key take-away moments from the summer experience.

One of my favorite memories from this summer have been:
I've really enjoyed the moments when my host family (Donna, Mike, Haley, and Hunter), Adam, and I have gathered around the dinner table and have spent hours talking, eating, and sharing life together. I've always been fond of long, family meals and long to have these (at least once a week) with my future family. These moments make wonderful "warm, fuzzy" memories.

One of my greatest challenges that I've experienced while here has been:
...Not having my girlfriends around to hang out with when Adam's playing poker or P90X with the guys! Not having them around though has challenged me to keep in touch with them through phone calls and Facebook messages!

One that I'll really miss about Arizona includes:
HOW BEAUTIFULLY STRAIGHT MY HAIR LOOKS, EVEN IN THE SUMMER! Oh, my hair's at its best out here! I'll definitely miss going on early runs when it's "toasty" outside (86 degrees at 6am). I'll miss the constant sunshine and the ability to wear shorts and a tank at 11pm at night. I'll miss gazing at the mountains on my way to work. Oops, was I only supposed to list one?

One thing that I've learned here about Adam and my relationship is:
...We really do make a great team! Adventuring out here as a couple has allowed us to "lean" on each other and grow in ways we never before found ourselves compatible. We've built memories together while striving to learn more about each other and how we can best serve one another. Never before have we spent more time together and never before have I been more in love. Don't get me wrong, there's been difficult times, for sure! We're much stronger because of this summer though, and we've had a ton of fun along the way.

One thing that I've learned here about myself is:
People really love me for me: crazy, silly, outgoing, loud, hard-working, dedicated, caring, compassionate me. Even in a new environment, I was able to confidently "be who I am" and loved it. Not only did I love it, but others did, too! They loved me for me, so I need to keep loving me for me, too!

One thing that I've learned here regarding my relationship with God includes:
God created me as a human BEing, not a human DOing. My personal relationship with God (aka spending time with God) can never be sacrificed for doing things for God (aka busy schedule), especially if I work in a church! I must be just as comfortable BEING with God as I am DOING for (or with) Him!

One Last Stop: The Grand Canyon

2009-08-04T19:06:00.005-04:00

Mission Accomplished!

Adam and I just completed the ONE task that my dad INSISTED we do before we come home: hike and camp out at the Grand Canyon! Although the one day-one night trip was short, we had a wonderful time. We visited the South Rim and hiked the Kaibab Trail (a 6 mile hike) to "Skeleton Point." We were humbled by the view (boy, did we feel small looking at at that canyon), captured by its beauty (God sure is creative), and enjoyed every minute of the hiking-camping experience!

Below are some favorite pictures from the trip. It was a wonderful way to end our time here in the West! We leave for back east on Thursday and expect to arrive in PA around August 13th or 14th.

A GORGEOUS VIEW of the South Rim at the start of our hike!

Stopping for a quick view while hiking! AMAZING!

Adam taking a break inside one of the canyon rocks!

When we reached Skeleton Point, we got a glimpse of the Colorado River. I was so surprised that it wasn't blue! False expectations? Oh well, blue or brown, we saw it!

Stopping for a picture pose on the hike back up!
We definitely took advantage of those camel backs!

Our "hobo" meals! We cooked chicken and veggies in tinfoil over the fire!

Checking out the South Rim right before sunset. A perfect ending to a breath-taking day.

"The Strip," Las Vegas

2009-07-27T21:22:00.010-04:00

This past weekend, Adam and I had an opportunity to hit "the strip" in Las Vegas, Nevada. We were graciously hosted by a family friend and her roommate, who took us out to dinner and showed us around to some of the "hot spots."

While Adam was excited to get a chance to play poker at a real poker table (he even won $60), we both enjoyed watching the fountains at the Bellagio, traveling through "Paris," and treating ourselves to the beautiful indoor walkway of the Venetian Casino. Of course, it wouldn't be a trip to Vegas without getting harassed by dozens upon dozens of advertisers for night clubs and "X" rated fun. I couldn't believe the number of cards that littered the ground or the amount of children that were walking around Vegas seeing the giant advertisements of half-naked women! Ah! No wonder the minds of our generation (and younger) are so saturated with sex.

The trip was certainly a taste of a different type of culture. Although "short-lived," I'm not sure we needed too much more time to understand just how different Vegas is from several other US big cities. Fortunately, there's hope, even for "Sin City." Since our trip, Adam and I have researched a church organization, called Strip Church, that's reaching out to people in Vegas in very creative ways. Check out the website if you're curious!

All in all, the trip was certainly a success and so much fun! Some of our pictures from the trip are included below. Stay tuned for an update on our trip to the Grand Canyon from August 2nd-4th!

Our party of four: Adam, myself, and our two wonderful hostesses, Sandy and Amanda. We ate a wonderful "tropical dinner" at Treasure Island. And yes, that's our DESSERT!

The infamous Bellagio! We were so captivated by the light show that we couldn't stop watching after just one song! Truly an amazing sight to see!

EVERYONE's in Vegas! I was so excited to meet Whoopi Golberg! I just loved her in Sister Act. Okay, okay. This is actually a "Wax Whoopi." Close enough though, right?

These tours were given inside the Venetian Casino. Yes, inside. It wasn't surprising considering what the inside of this "mall area" looked like. Talk about stunning and romantic!

On the way to and fro Vegas, we traveled across the Hoover Dam and stopped to take some pictures! I wasn't expecting this sort of beauty!

This picture doesn't even come close to justifying the beauty of this scenery. The water is so blue, and with it surrounded by the mountains, it's just like a postcard. Adam informed me that the water's "blue" is caused by minerals. In fact, the white that is shown on the mountains is calcium build up: the water reaches up to the heights of the white/brown line!

A view of the Hoover Dam. There were so many people parked on the side of the road just to tour and photograph the Dam!

Another view of the Dam. Adam tells me that it's the largest cement structure in the world! I believe it!

How to Talk to Girls

2009-07-22T14:14:00.005-04:00

While in our "pastors' meeting" yesterday, I caught sight of an advertisement in a children's ministry magazine for a book that a NINE YEAR OLD BOY wrote. The title: How to Talk to Girls. Fascinated with the reality that a nine year old boy published a book, I continued to read all about Alec Greven. He published his first book at age eight, has also written a book titled How to Talk to Moms, and has a book about Santa Clause coming out in September! I was ecstatic to discover that one of our pastors actually owned a copy of How to Talk to Girls.

Here are some of my favorite excerpts:

A crush is a love disease. It can drive you mad.
If you are in elementary school, try to get a girl to like you, not to love you. Wait until middle school to try to get her to love you. Otherwise, you have to hold on to her for a long time and that would be very hard. (Tip: Most boys in elementary school can hold on to a girl for only 30 days.)
Some girls are talkative. Some girls are shy. Go for a talkative girl if you are shy. Then you only have to say one sentence, and she will do the rest of the talking.
If she doesn't like you, don't worry, it happens.
If you do win victory with a girl, don't cheer in front of her.
Use caution! When you see a pretty girl, don't let her tractor beam pull you in.

What an incredible way to share with children that they matter! Imagine how nine year old boys (and girls) can be inspired by hearing Alec's story! I definitely think I'll be purchasing this book for my personal collection.

Teaching Interview Questions

2009-07-16T16:59:00.003-04:00

While preparing for some teaching interviews, I ran across a great article that shares "Principals' 30 Favorite Questions for Future Teachers." If any of you are preparing to one day be a teacher (or know of anyone who is preparing) this is a great source to print out and save for future reference!

Below are also some common questions that I've been asked while interviewing. Good luck!

I noticed you student taught at _________________. Tell me about your experience. What were your strengths and what were your weaknesses during this experience?

Describe a reading lesson from start to finish.

Tell me about some of your extra-circulars in high school and college.

We've been brainstorming ways to incorporate technology into the classroom. How experienced are you with a smart board?How experienced are you with a smart board?What are some of your ideas?

How do you measure a student's success?

What are some of your ideas concerning how to encourage parent involvement in a students' education?

It seems like you have a lot of strengths. What is an area that you are looking to improve? How do you plan to do so?

Do you have any questions for us?

True Beauty

2009-07-15T15:03:00.011-04:00

I recently finished John and Stasi Eldredge's book Captivating. The book focuses on women's desires to be romanced, to be needed, and to be beautiful. It is quite an interesting read. I aim to soon read Wild at Heart.

The following are two descriptions of "beautiful women" that were contrasted in the book. The descriptions reminded me of the pressure women feel to "be [physically] beautiful" in this world, while ironically, attaining or "striving" (as Stasi Eldredge describes) for such beauty is exhausting.

Janet is twenty-one. She was on the dance team in high school. Small and petite with a fabulous figure. Unlike so many women in that world of competitive beauty, she escaped an eating disorder. But she runs between five and ten miles a day. She watches what she eats. She's able to wear the cutest clothes. And yet...when you're with her, your heart does not rest. Her beauty impresses, but it does not invite. The reason is simple: She is striving. She is a perfectionist (an extra two pounds is a crisis; a pimple is a disaster). Her beauty feels tenuous, shaky. It is not flowing from her heart. It's almost as if it's forced, from the outside, through discipline and fear.

June is one of the most beautiful women we have ever met. We encountered her a few years ago while doing a retreat on the coast of North Carolina. Her hair was long, swept up loosely and held by decorative combs. She wore unique, dangly earrings and pretty flowering skirts. Her eyes sparkled when she laughed, which he did often, and her smile lit up the room, She was clearly in love with her husband, her face adoring as she gazed at him. June was at rest with herself, at home in who she was. Talking with her, just being with her, made us feel more at rest with ourselves as well. Her spacious, beautiful soul invited others to come, to be, to taste and see that the Lord is good, whatever was happening in your life. She wept at the retreat. She laughed at the retreat. She was gloriously alive and in love, both with her husband and with the God of the Universe. And June was about seventy-five years old.

While reading, I found myself identifying too much with Janet while I long to make an impression like June's. I run (and feel bad when I don't). I watch what I eat. I have "perfectionist" traits. Yet, I love to smile. I love to laugh. I love to believe that my presence is inviting and alive. Why are both beauties so desirable?

As this has been a matter that I've been praying over for quite some time (wanting to "love myself" for who I've been created to be), I've believe I've finally begun to experience just the tip of the iceberg of God's unique love for me. I find myself praying to be a June more and a Janet less, and I don't plan on taking 75 years to live and share it with others.

True beauty, Eldredge writes, is one in which, "A woman invites us to know God. To experience through her that God is merciful. That he is tender and kind. That God longs for us-to be known by us and to know us. She invites us to experience that God is good, deep, lovely, alluring. Captivating."

I can feel beautiful because God created me beautifully. My beauty (my confidence, my love, my caring) invites others to know God. Let's face it, confidence is, after all, attractive!

What a unique way to view beauty! Beauty as a...way to witness for God.

Now that's a beauty to believe in and desire!

Decision Time

2009-07-11T23:55:00.002-04:00

I knew this time would come around. I didn't realize that it would happen sooner than later.

Decision time: Public school teaching vs. Ministry

Realistically, this has been a decision that I've struggled with for a long time. Ever since I was five years old, I pretended to teach my stuffed animals via spelling book packets and a small chalkboard attached to one of my bedroom walls. I wanted to be a teacher. When I was 18, however, after making the decision to get baptized and beginning on my journey with Christ, I fascinated over teaching students with a different, eternal curriculum in mind.

Since then, I've struggled for a long time trying to decide into which field I fee "called." I remember graduating from high school, traveling to a high school Christian conference in Tennessee (CIY) in which I made a commitment to "enter into the ministry" and coming home perplexed because I was not going to a "Bible college" that August. How was I to fulfill my "ministry calling" if I didn't attend a Bible college? That summer, I remember spending hours on the computer researching Christian colleges with youth ministry and children's ministry majors, finally giving up my search a few days before heading to Albright College to pursue "secular degrees" in elementary education and psychology.

My indecisiveness didn't end then. (I wish!) I struggled for over a year trying to decide whether I wanted to transfer to Eastern University to pursue youth ministry, in which a mentor couple of Adam and myself suggested to stay at Albright, receive my education degree, and then, after I graduated, if I was feeling called, to pursue seminary and ministry afterwards.

The couple insisted that during these next four years, I take full advantage of my perfect opportunity to pursue college experiences, while likewise, still being able to stay fairly connected with ministry through attending and volunteering at Christ's Church of the Valley.

And, did I ever take advantage of all those opportunities!

Since then, at CCV, I've volunteered in the children's ministry as a "lead teacher" (one who teachers large group lessons from stage) for grades 2nd-5th, I've volunteered in student ministries as an "Impact Coach" for middle school students, and I've served in summer camps to reach out to new children and students. During summers, I've traveled with CIY's "Know Sweat" team to complete service projects with middle and high school students across the Midwest, and even accepted a summer children/youth internship at CCV (PA) where my ministry responsibilities (speaking, events, volunteer coordination, etc.) truly began to ripen.

Opportunities, too, to explore public school teaching have arose over the years, and I hadn't forgotten to explore those as well. Studying education in school, I volunteered at countless tutoring sessions at local elementary schools, working for four years at an after-school program in Reading. I've completed practicum sessions for nearly every grade K-6, including a full semester of "student teaching," a teaching internship in and of itself.

And where has all this experience and learning brought me, four years passed?

...at a crossroad. A decision to make: Public school teaching or Ministry?

I've graduated from Albright. I have my degrees in both elementary education and psychology. I find myself in yet another ministry internship at a mega church in Peoria, AZ this summer (this time strictly for children's ministry), and there are offers on the table.

You see, earlier this week, I was elated to discover that I received a job offer at Northwest Elementary, the first school that I student taught at during my "Practicum Semester" at Albright. When leaving the elementary school (my placement was in a 5th grade classroom), the principal said to me, "You'll be hearing from me." Not wanting to set myself up for disappointment, I didn't think too much of it, especially because I've accepted that my plans for the next year (until Adam and I marry and we settle somewhere) are a huge question mark with a giant sticker that says TRUST GOD at the bottom. A few days ago, the principal called me herself! She offered a fourth grade position and wanted to know when I can "conference call" to interview with the board.

Amazing! Thank you, Lord. (As August quickly inches closer, I've been really praying about "future-job-stuff.")

Interestingly, that same day, I sat down with my summer internship supervisor as he invited me to consider pursuing a year-long internship in the later childhood department at CCV (AZ). He described some of the benefits of a year-long internship and shared his insight for future job possibilities (not promised, of course). Knowing my plans with Adam, he offered his prayers for the decisions that lie ahead.

Money. Marriage. Jobs. Moving. Decisions.

While trying to discipline myself to "give it [my decisions] to God in prayer," I often think about the conversations that I've shared with people concerning the differences and similarities between teaching in public school and in a "church setting." I often argue that my passion to teach in public school allows all children, especially those who don't go to church, to be loved, encouraged, and taught by someone whose heart belongs to Jesus.

Yet, as wonderfully evangelistic as this motivation is, I can't help ignore my still existing, prominently strong fascination with "ministry." There's no doubt that I'm most passionate about speaking to children and students, and dare I say, I'm good at it. I've taken a serious interest in studying speakers' techniques and advice, and upon each opportunity, seek to improve what I hold true as a God-given gift. In fact, I find it incredible that at this Arizona internship alone I have been encouraged by countless adults, teenagers, and children with my gift of speaking. I have kids rushing the stage to give me high-fives after I'm speaking. I over-hear 2nd-6th grade boys reenacting the stories that I tell on stage. Boys! I've offered speaking and group-management advice to high school leaders, and they've loved it and passed it along to their friends. Staff members in the children's department have joked about "bringing me on staff" or have initiated conversation about considering future possibilities within the field. Usually, I find myself storing these memories in my heart, then brushing them off as, " these people are just saying nice things!"

I'm beginning to really be convinced though, that it's all to bizarre to not involve God.

Decision time. All prayers are so deeply appreciated!

Kids Say the Darnest Things!

2009-07-08T20:25:00.006-04:00

One of my favorite things about children's ministry is listening to kids' responses to questions.

Just two weeks ago, I was leading a small group for 2nd and 3rd graders, and just after talking about John 3:16, I asked if there were any questions. One girl raised her hand and asked, "Is Santa real?"

Below are a few answers to kids' responses that Jeri (the other children's intern) and I organized for a recent website update. Whereas I marvel at the complexity of some answers (these students are all in 6th grade), I can't help smile at the innocence and simplicity in others. I hope that you enjoy reading them as much as I did!

How has God changed your life?

God has changed my life. I got bit by a pit bull (Personally, I think this was the devil's work) But God saved me to where I only got 2 stitches on my face and about 3-4 cuts instead of ripping off my cheek.

I am not proud of a lot of the things I have done but God has helped me get over and helped clear all of my sins. If it wasn't for God I don't know if I would be here right now. If

I wasn't close to God I wouldn't have gotten this far in my life. God has saved me!

God has changed my life by giving me Melody, my 8 year old sister. I would have been a pretty boring kid if it weren't for God. He has brightened my life.

How have you seen God change someone else's life?

I have seen God change my dad's life so we can be a family now.

God changed my mom's life. She was smoking 3 packs a day.

Like I had a bully, he was mean to me. I told my teacher I needed to go to the bathroom. She said yes. When I was in the bathroom I didn't have to go but I prayed for him. When it was lunch he started to be nice and played basketball with me. To me that was kind of weird!

God changed my dad when God spoke to me and my mom. We kept on seeing scriptures on adoption. But when we told my dad he was very against it. So every night me and my mom prayed. One day my dad came home from work and filled out all the papers for the adoption.

What's the difference between someone who knows God and someone who doesn't know God?

The difference of someone knowing God and someone who doesn't know God is that if you know the Lord your life is complete. You know how to live your life and you know who loves you most. If you don't know God, your life is a whole question. Who created you? Who made this land? Who loves you most of all? You don't know how to take control. That's the difference!
People who don't know God have a hole in their heart. They don't have a meaning or purpose in life. They feel empty and end up doing wrong things to cover it up. People who do know God know why they were put in this world. They feel like their lives are important for God's work. They love life and they love Christ.
The difference is that non-believers cuss and they don't go to Heaven, and that is why He has us take them to church.

I wonder, what would your answers be to these three questions? Would they be as entertaining as a 6th grader's?

Animal Lover

2009-07-07T23:29:00.002-04:00

For the past few days, my host family here in Peoria, AZ has been on vacation visiting family in Texas and New Mexico. While they've been gone, they've asked me to take care of their pets (2 dogs, 1 rabbit, and 1 bird), in addition to maintaining the house in a few minor ways (watering the plants, collecting the mail, etc.). While I was extremely excited for their return on Tuesday (it's scary to stay in a big house by yourself in a state thousands of miles from "home"), I realize that I've learned a lot by spending these few days "living on my own." Not that I haven't lived on my own before...well, sort of. For my last two years at college, I lived in an apartment. Although, then, I lived with three of my friends, minimal responsibilities, and definitely no pets.

I am definitely not an animal lover.

Don't get me wrong, I grew up with pets. Cats, dogs, cat-fish, tadpole, we had many. Ever since I was old enough to understand the time, commitment, and MONEY that owning a pet requires however, I've very strongly expressed my desire to NOT have pets "when I grow up." House-sitting and having the responsibility for the food and care of a few animals independently, especially dogs, has absolutely reinforced my distaste for owning animals. I simply don't have the patience. I know that my lifestyle will be one (it already is) in which it's not a priority of mine to carve out the time for pets (to play with them, give them attention, etc.). While my host family isn't here to entertain the dogs, each day when I return home from work, I'm greeted by two excited dogs with toys in mouths ready to chase Frisbees, to eat snacks, and to be loved. (Or so we assume.) Frustrated because they always seem to block the doorway so perfectly, I yell to them, "I just don't love you as much as your family does!"

Sunday night, rushing out the door from these two [dogs] once again, I attended the High School Service here at CCV, in which a message was delivered by one of the staff about being "made" by God. He boldly shared that God has created us so that he can love us. We are the only creations that he has crafted that can feel and return love. He said, "...not the mountains, not the sea, not the animals. You may love your dog, but your dog doesn't love you. He only follows you around because he wants food. God created you because He loves you and you can love Him back."

Ha! All you animal lovers are wasting your time!

Part of me adored the message because I felt validated for my numbness towards animals. Why put effort into loving something that wasn't created to return love? An even bigger part of me marveled at the truth that God's created humans because He desires to love and to be loved. But then I wondered, "So why do I feel so darn guilty when I put up the 'doggy fence' to block the dogs from bothering me, knowing that no one has played with them in days? Are we really the only creations that can love? If animals have the mental capacity to be trained for tricks and tasks, if animals can communicate by means of barks, growls, and rubs, why don't they have the capacity to express love? After all, why do these dogs choose to lay at my feet while reading, eating, or sleeping. Why do they chase me around the pool when I'm holding my breath underwater with a look of fear in their eyes? And why do they have to look so darn cute?

Can animals love?

And I thought people were confusing. This is why I cannot own pets! There are too many questions that require expert advice and guidance. It's challenging enough trying to understand the mindsets of men and women so that I can better serve them. I've accepted that God is mysterious...

But, pets?

California Adventure

2009-07-06T18:09:00.008-04:00

A few posts back, I mentioned that Adam, myself, and some friends would be venturing to the Grand Canyon. Unfortunately, because of 4th of July weekend, we weren't able to reserve a camp-site in time (as we were planning to hike down into the canyon and camp out over night). We're still planning on hiking the canyon in a few weeks, but for our 4th of July celebration, we ventured to Huntington Beach in California instead! We both agreed that the trip was too short, but lucky for us, with a few connections in California, we'll be back soon! Adam's already posted about the trip (you can read his blog here), but here are a few more pictures of our first California beach adventure!

We're there! Huntington Beach, CA.
(Less than an hour from Disney Land!)

My FIRST GLANCE at the Pacific Ocean! (Yes, we're still in the car. A picture was definitely necessary!)

The hotel where we stayed. Okay, just kidding. It's a random building across from the beach. It's gorgeous though. You definitely don't see this at the NJ shore!

The beautiful beach! It was breezy, sunny, and 80 degrees. I promise you the sand feels (and looks) different than that on the NJ coast.

Okay, it's obvious that this isn't the beach. We passed these mountains on the way to Huntington, in California! They're GORGEOUS and HUGE..perhaps about 15,000 ft!AND, to make the drive even more interesting...right near the giant mountains were HUNDREDS of WINDMILLS. These power MASSIVE AMOUNTS of energy. It was crazy seeing so many of them along the mountain range!

Text Messaging Prayer Reminders?!

2009-07-01T00:57:00.005-04:00

Over the past few months, I've been very particular when telling just anyone that I'll be praying for them whenever they share requests. As I've taken a true look at my prayer life, I've realized that I don't pray nearly half as much for people as I promise!

"Oh, I'm praying for you!" How many times have we all heard that? Has anyone else other than me ever wondered, "Now, do they really mean that? How often are they really praying? How can they remember?"

Unfortunately, I've become just a tad bitter to the idea of "praying for (so many) other people."

Until now.

Can I really get a text-message reminder to...pray?

I received an email today from one of the children's pastors at Christ's Church of the Valley here in Peoria. The emailed explained his similar frustration with not always being able to "keep his word" when promising to pray for others. he included a link to an interesting website that he found to help "organize" his prayers: Echo Prayer Manager.

The site, Echo Prayer Manager, does just that: manages your prayers. Upon signing up, one can "submit" multiple prayer requests and set reminder times (repeated on a weekly basis) so that reminders can be sent via email or text message throughout the day to better help one manage praying for multiple people and/or issues. One can even submit journals, comments, and "answered prayer" notes so that the reminders can change and/or stop.

As creator Ben Rugg describes on Echo Prayer's website, "It's pretty obvious the Bible calls us to pray for each other. James exhorts us to pray in all circumstances, Paul tells us to pray continually, and Jesus is an example even while he's on the cross (see James 5:13-18, 1 Thes 5:17, Luke 23:32-34). Echo is a tool to help you pray more diligently. Pray for your coworkers, your friends, your family, your church, your country, your issues. And thank God continually."

If you're interested, take a look at the website...and sign up! It's neat to think that such a resource exists to strengthen our walk with Christ. Ben Rugg, you have used certainly used your talents to glorify God! As Ruggs write, "Let's change the world. Let's pray for the people around us like we were meant to. And let's show the world that the one true God deserves all the glory."

Another Monday Adventure: Biosphere2

2009-06-30T00:02:00.011-04:00

Every Monday, Adam and I try and go on an "adventure" that we've never done before and can only experience while we're out West here. Today, we ventured to Tucson, Arizona to visit the University of Arizona's Biosphere2. This Biosphere2 (Biosphere 1 is our planet Earth) is the largest of its kind in the world. Within the glass structure (created to simulate environmental behavior without human interruption) there are 5 different natural habitats: savanna, coastal fog desert, tropical ocean, rain forest, and agricultural. It was quite an experience traveling from one area with 80% humidity to another with just 15% humidity (yet 95 degrees) within a matter of steps. The history of Biosphere2 is intriguing, especially facts on the September of 1991-September of 1993 experiment in which 8 researchers lived within the sphere without leaving once for a span of two years. Take a look at the pictures! We really had a blast. I'm blessed that I get to share my life with someone who loves adventure so much. Speaking of, this week should be a short week, as we leave Thursday for the Grand Canyon! If you're interested in learning more about Biosphere2, check out the website!

Above: Biosphere2 from an outside view. The structure is completed composed from glass and steel rods to allow the sunlight to stimulate and sustain growth. It's mind-boggling!

Above: Pictures of a few of the different types of atmospheres, including ocean, rain forest and savanna.

Above: Biosphere2 is snuggled within Tuscon's Santa Catalina Mountain Range. What a view!

One Month Down, One Month to Go!

2009-06-27T14:38:00.005-04:00

I can't believe that the month of June is almost over! One month has seemed to go a lot quicker than I imagined when saying goodbye to my family before taking flight back to Arizona. After July, Adam and I will only be out here until August 8th, and then we start trekking back across the country to return home.

Since we're pretty settled in now, let me share with you all who are used to seeing us so frequently our "somewhat weekly schedule" of how time passes so quickly around here!

Mondays: Mondays are beautiful. They are the only days that we get completely off, start to finish. Usually Adam and I will try to venture to some place "new" on a Monday. Whether it be somewhere close like the Phoenix Zoo or a friend's pool or somewhere a bit more adventurous like Sedona, we thoroughly enjoy our Mondays to regroup from the hectic weekends.

Tuesdays-Fridays: The remaining days of the week are "office days." During these days, Adam, I, and the CCV Family Ministries staff will head into the office from roughly 8:30am-5pm each day. Here we connect with volunteers through phone calls, emails, and personal luncheons. Frequently, we'll complete pre and post summer camp work, and attend dozens of meetings to establish plans for upcoming weekends, series, and events. If we're lucky, we get
Tuesdays-Fridays each off their own special occasion.

On Tuesdays, Adam's host family, the Simpsons (yes, the television family, you're all so wise) provide a "family dinner" for any intern that isn't from Arizona. It's always fun to join with 7-9 other people to celebrate life together. These dinners are always fun-and the food is wonderful, too!

Wednesdays are often a day when I tackle "1:1s" (personal meetings with individual staff members) over lunch and/or coffee breaks. I'll admit, these trips are my favorite-after all, how can one be in ministry and not love to socialize.

On Thursdays, all the summer and year long interns at CCV (total there are roughly 15) gather together for "Leadership Institute" class at 8:45am. The classes are always a wonderful way to start off the day, and the topics, whether discussing organization, spiritual development, or theology, are helpful for our leadership skills.

Finally, Fridays always come as a relief, and much to Adam and my enjoyment, it's "date night." Establishing some time for us two to spend together out to dinner, watching a movie, or exploring a new date idea is important as we're constantly busy between church services, outreach events, and individual schedules.

Saturday-Sunday: And finally, the WEEKEND! These are the moments we work for! CCV has services both on Saturday nights (4:30pm + 6:15pm) and Sunday mornings (9:30am + 11:15am), so naturally, you can see where MUCH of our time is spent. It's here though that Adam and my schedule differ, too.

Saturday mornings are nice and relaxing. I'll immediately change into my bathing suit, usually spend some time "working out" on the Wii Fit (oh, yea!), and enjoy much time lounging around the pool, reading, and spending time with my host family. It's a real Sabbath-at least for a bit. Around 3pm, I'm off to work-to church-getting ready to prepare for the evening services. After serving at both 4:30pm and 6:15pm, I'll often meet Adam and some friends for dinner, (we get free "cafe passes" if we work all four services) where we'll stay until about 9pm at night. (It's a genius idea for building community at church-everyone does it!)

Sundays are similar, as I'm back at work by 9am, often finishing by 1pm, just in time to head back to my host family's house for a special "Sunday dinner." Together, usually around 1:30pm or so, we feast to a FANTASTIC MEAL and enjoy each other's company for some time. Afterwards, around 3:30pm or so, Adam heads off to High School ministry, where he's committed with service and post-service activities until 10pm or so. Sometimes I choose to join (the after-parties are quite fun), although other times, it's nice to relax a bit after the weekend frenzy.

And then, it starts all over! The weeks are exhausting, but with set days to celebrate "Sabbath," it's easy to keep up our much needed energy. Sometimes it takes getting away from "home" for a bit to appreciate how to discipline your time for your best efforts.

One month down, one month to go! It's shocking. The summer is flying, and it doesn't help; we're enjoying ourselves and learning so much! We know that it's safe to say that we're confident that this is where we needed to be this summer.

Stay posted for a schedule of upcoming trips, including one to the GRAND CANYON this Thursday, July 2nd-4th!

Transformation Groups

2009-06-26T00:57:00.009-04:00

Here at CCV Arizona I've quickly gotten involved with a great small-group like ministry called Transformation Groups. Each Friday, two interns, one children's ministry staff and myself meet for lunch to discuss personal accountability, spiritual growth, and development.

Thus far, the group has been an incredible opportunity to discipline my daily morning scripture readings, discuss biblical questions and insights, and share praises and struggles with a few women.

Here a few facts about "T-Groups" that I grabbed off CCV's website. Take a look, it may need to be the next step you need to make in your journey with Christ!

What is a Transformation Group?

If you want to go deeper, then a T-Group is perfect for you. A T-Group is made up of three to four people, all of the same gender, who meet weekly for personal accountability for their spiritual growth and development. The goal is to become like Christ and also help others become spiritual disciples who can in turn reproduce others. Groups that have four participants should start to look at starting two new groups.

* It meets weekly for approximately one hour
* It is not co-ed, but gender specific
* It uses the Bible as the only curriculum
* A leader gives direction to the group
* Leadership may be rotated within the group
* Multiplication is expected
* T-group is not a replacement for participation in a Neighborhood group (small groups, similar to CCV PA's "home teams")

If you're interested in more information about T-Groups, view a downloadable brochure from CCV's website. This brochure shares what is accomplished in T-Groups, what the three main tasks are, and even includes a list of accountability questions! You don't have to be a member at CCV Arizona to pursue spiritual development with a few close friends. If you feel a conviction to get something started, pray about it and see where it leads! It won't be a journey that you'll regret!

First Speaking Weekend!

2009-06-15T01:17:00.009-04:00

My voice is soar and I'm exhausted, but boy, has this past weekend been a joy!

For four services (two on Saturday night and two on Sunday morning), I taught the message in the 2nd/3rd grade classroom. (Classroom is an understatement, these rooms are MASSIVE!)

Needless to say, it was a refreshing experience. I was reminded all over again how passionate I am about speaking, and how God's gifted me with energy-especially energy to relate to children.

Before speaking, I pried around the children's department at CCV to get a better understand of the history of women's speakers for large group. History: there is none, at least for the past few years. All of the "pastors" in children's ministry from 2nd-6th grade are men, and as far as the teaching rotation, I was told that there have been no women who have voiced a desire to teach. "Perhaps women feel inadequate of teaching at that level or feel that they're too much of a mom to relate to the students in large group," one woman shared with me. "Nonetheless, besides an intern or two, there hasn't really been any women teaching on stage."

Interesting.

When I stepped into the run-through rehearsal, I was not alone as a "newbie" for speaking. That weekend, two other male speakers, one for 4th/5th grade and one for 6th grade were also speaking for the first times. Although I was a bit comforted by the company, I couldn't ignore the nerves that I felt for speaking at a new place, to a new crowd, with new expectations, regulations, and procedures.

Nerves? Me?

Not for long.

Some favorite feedback, conversations, and memories included:

1. Receiving positive commentary from the children's staff during run-through. I was told that for my first time, I did a great job. Even better, afterward, I was able to collect some tips from some of the male pastors and programming team, which helped me animate my stories even more. After speaking with the staff, I was encouraged and inspired to be goofy with the lesson so to connect with the kids while having killer teaching moments.

2. Receiving a number of positive comments from students, "You were awesome!" or "You're so funny!" or "Are you really from Pennsylvania?" Even some of the little boys wanted to give me high-fives! (I'm always touched when boys can enjoy my teaching, too. That way I'm comforted that I can connect with both genders!)

3. Having a mom approach me to ask, "Are you the young girl who taught for the 2nd/3rd grade services this weekend? My high school boy volunteers in that room and he told me that a 'young girl taught today. She was really good and really funny. She did a great job!'" (Best of all, this boy told his mom that he thought that I was in high school, too! No matter, any time that I can connect with a high school boy during a children's class is a success to me!)

Needless to say, I'm extremely excited to speak again for both the 4th/5th grade services and the 6th grade services. I am so grateful for the staff that is investing in us interns so that we can better share the gospel. There are so many people here that are skilled speakers and teachers; it's so inspiring! I can't wait to spend some more time with these gifted people to continue learning.

Below are two more pictures of the children's building (3yrs-6th grade). I apologize for not posting these earlier! More pictures to come!

Strengths Finder Test

2009-06-07T21:56:00.007-04:00

As part of the CCV internship training class, all interns are required to take the Clifton Strengths Finder Test, a web based assessment measuring an individual's top five "signature themes." The online quiz can only be accessed with the purchase of Albert Winseman, Donald Clifton, and Curt Lifesveld's book Living your Strengths.

The book explains how to discover your God-given talents to inspire your community. In it, it describes the difference between strengths, talents, knowledge, and skill, in which a strength (the ability to provide consistent, near perfect performance in a given activity) is made up of talents, knowledge, and skill.

While knowledge is "what you know through education or training," skills are "the basic ability to move through the fundamental steps of a task." Talents are "naturally reoccurring patterns of thought, feeling, or behavior that can be productively applied." Signature Themes are the five categories in which your talents are the greatest.

The book lists 34 possible "Signature Themes." Of them, your "'top five' are unique to you." In fact, one's strengths are so unique that the book boldly states that "your chances of meeting someone with your same Signature Themes, regardless of order, are less than 1 in 275,000. And, incredible as it may seem, there is only 1 in 33 million chance that you will meet someone whose Signature Themes match yours and are in the same order."

Below, I've included a list of the 34 possible themes.
My "top five" themes follow afterwards with a short description of each.

34 Themes:
Achiever, Activator, Adaptability, Analytical, Arranger, Belief, Command, Communication, Competition, Connectedness, Consistency, Context, Deliberative, Developer, Discipline, Empathy, Focus, Futuristic, Harmony, Ideation, Includer, Individualization, Input, Intellection, Learner, Maximizer, Positivity, Relator, Responsibility, Restorative, Self-Assurance, Significance, Strategic, Woo

My Top Five (in order):

Discipline
Your world needs to be predictable. It needs to be ordered and planned. So you instinctively impose structure on your world. You set up routines. You focus on timelines and deadlines. You break long-term projects into a series of specific short-term plans, and you work through each plan diligently. You are not necessarily neat and clean, but you do need precision. Faced with the inherent messiness of life, you want to feel in control. The routines, the timelines, the structure, all of these help create this feeling of control. Lacking this theme of Discipline, others may sometimes resent your need for order, but there need not be conflict. You must understand that not everyone feels your urge for predictability; they have other ways of getting things done. Likewise, you can help them understand and even appreciate your need for structure. Your dislike of surprises, your impatience with errors, your routines, and your detail orientation don’t need to be misinterpreted as controlling behaviors that box people in. Rather, these behaviors can be understood as your instinctive method for maintaining your progress and your productivity in the face of life’s many distractions.
Maximizer
Excellence, not average, is your measure. Taking something from below average to slightly above average takes a great deal of effort and in your opinion is not very rewarding. Transforming something strong into something superb takes just as much effort but is much more thrilling. Strengths, whether yours or someone else’s, fascinate you. Like a diver after pearls, you search them out, watching for the telltale signs of a strength. A glimpse of untutored excellence, rapid learning, a skill mastered without recourse to steps—all these are clues that a strength may be in play. And having found a strength, you feel compelled to nurture it, refine it, and stretch it toward excellence. You polish the pearl until it shines. This natural sorting of strengths means that others see you as discriminating. You choose to spend time with people who appreciate your particular strengths. Likewise, you are attracted to others who seem to have found and cultivated their own strengths. You tend to avoid those who want to fix you and make you well rounded. You don’t want to spend your life bemoaning what you lack. Rather, you want to capitalize on the gifts with which you are blessed. It’s more fun. It’s more productive. And, counterintuitively, it is more demanding.
Futuristic
“Wouldn’t it be great if . . .” You are the kind of person who loves to peer over the horizon. The future fascinates you. As if it were projected on the wall, you see in detail what the future might hold, and this detailed picture keeps pulling you forward, into tomorrow. While the exact content of the picture will depend on your other strengths and interests—a better product, a better team, a better life, or a better world—it will always be inspirational to you. You are a dreamer who sees visions of what could be and who cherishes those visions. When the present proves too frustrating and the people around you too pragmatic, you conjure up your visions of the future and they energize you. They can energize others, too. In fact, very often people look to you to describe your visions of the future. They want a picture that can raise their sights and thereby their spirits. You can paint it for them. Practice. Choose your words carefully. Make the picture as vivid as possible. People will want to latch on to the hope you bring.
Developer
You see the potential in others. Very often, in fact, potential is all you see. In your view no individual is fully formed. On the contrary, each individual is a work in progress, alive with possibilities. And you are drawn toward people for this very reason. When you interact with others, your goal is to help them experience success. You look for ways to challenge them. You devise interesting experiences that can stretch them and help them grow. And all the while you are on the lookout for the signs of growth—a new behavior learned or modified, a slight improvement in a skill, a glimpse of excellence or of “flow” where previously there were only halting steps. For you these small increments—invisible to some—are clear signs of potential being realized. These signs of growth in others are your fuel. They bring you strength and satisfaction. Over time many will seek you out for help and encouragement because on some level they know that your helpfulness is both genuine and fulfilling to you.
Achiever
Your Achiever theme helps explain your drive. Achiever describes a constant need for achievement. You feel as if every day starts at zero. By the end of the day you must achieve something tangible in order to feel good about yourself. And by “every day” you mean every single day—workdays, weekends, vacations. No matter how much you may feel you deserve a day of rest, if the day passes without some form of achievement, no matter how small, you will feel dissatisfied. You have an internal fire burning inside you. It pushes you to do more, to achieve more. After each accomplishment is reached, the fire dwindles for a moment, but very soon it rekindles itself, forcing you toward the next accomplishment. Your relentless need for achievement might not be logical. It might not even be focused. But it will always be with you. As an Achiever you must learn to live with this whisper of discontent. It does have its benefits. It brings you the energy you need to work long hours without burning out. It is the jolt you can always count on to get you started on new tasks, new challenges. It is the power supply that causes you to set the pace and define the levels of productivity for your work group. It is the theme that keeps you moving.

I must admit that I don't necessarily agree with all of them. There are definitely others that I desire and that I believe could potentially fit as a "top 5" strength. Nonetheless, I can certainly learn from the above information, as well as that which is given in the book. It's a great resource for leaders. Browse the website and check it out for yourself!

UCYC Camp

2009-06-06T14:09:00.007-04:00

This past week, after the craze of driving and flying back and forth between Arizona and Pennsylvania for a very important retreat, graduation, and wedding, Adam and I finally returned back to Phoenix at 11pm (2am Eastern-Standard time) Sunday, May 31st.

Needless to say, we were exhausted.

And at 9:15am that Monday morning, I left for UCYC, United Christian Youth Camp, the camp every 4th-6th grader at CCV in Arizona was talking about.

No break for me, not quite yet.

Quickly immersing myself in the 4th-6th grade culture, I enjoyed getting to know both the students and their counselors! We'd wake up early and stay up late to "do hair," share stories, and reveal interesting facts about ourselves. We particpated in everything from rock climbing, zip lining, and field games to hiking, swimming, and "geo cache"ing. The girls were completely thrilled that I was engaged, and asked me every question in the book! (This seems to always be a common theme.) Beyond the "fun" time, however, some of my favorite memories, take-away moments, and reflections came from the Chapel services and small group times. It was incredible how much information the students learned about Jesus in a manner that captured their inquisitive minds.

A small list of my favorite moments at camp included:

1. Watching the 5th and 6th grade boys worship.
5th and 6th grade boys don't worship. They're too cool. They're always the kids standing in the back of the room with a scowl on their face and their arms crosssed. Not this time. I watched these boys worship: genuinely dancing, shouting, lifting their hands up in praise to their God. It was beautiful. (Although I'd never mention that to them!)

2. Watching kids grow, in even just a matter of days.
I remember meeting this one girl (I'll call her Jamie) in the beginning of the week. Jamie was shy, quiet, and kept to herself. She was the type of girl that excused herself from activities and drug along other girls with her. By the end of the week, Jamie had asked me to "do her hair," and today, while at church, she ran up to me, jumped into my arms, and gave me a huge hug. What an accomplishment, I thought.

3. Watching Reggie Rice (my children's ministry supervisor at CCV) teach the kids about Jesus.
Talk about a gift. I never before thought it was possible-or even a good idea-to preach to children about Jesus before I listened to Reggie. I never before saw hundreds of kids take out their Bibles to follow along with the Biblical passages. I never before watched the story of Jesus become more alive, more animated, or more interesting to kids-and me! I am so excited to learn everything I possibly can here.

Two major take-away that I had from camp included:

1. 4th-6th graders ask some great questions about God-if you give them the chance.
I've never before had an opportunity to sit one-on-one with a 10 or 11 year old to ask them questions about God. Wow, do they understand some things. Wow, do they have questions about some things. Wow, are they so willing to listen and learn. One thing I love about this children's ministry is that they have big expectations for the growth of their children. Stories and sugarcoated and questions aren't ignored. A lot is expected from an eleven year old.

2. A sucessful ministry involves leaders who are dedicated to spiritual journies of their volunteers.
I am so impressed by CCV's leadership. Each morning, before our chapel services and activities commenced, CCV pastors would host a counselor meeting where we were encouraged to immerse ourselves into the Word and prayer that day. We read scripture together, and shared stories of praise to encourage one another. We were reminded that if we were not to spend time with God, our "spiritual tanks" would be empty, with nothing to share with the students.

Upon "debriefing" about camp, a few reflections inclulde:

1. God's gifted me with incredible enthusiasm and energy, and I can't ignore that.
At age 22, I have the energy of an 11 year old. I can keep with their pace, laugh at their jokes, and celebrate life with them. I never realized how much natural talent is required in relating to kids. Working with kids requires a true gift, and I think I've got it!

2. It's really easy for me to talk to kids.
"What do you think about God?" may often seem like an akward question to be asked, but with 4th-6th graders, I have no fear in talking to them about their faith! It may seem odd to think that one could engage in a spiritual conversation with a 10 year old, but so often this week did I find times when I chatted one-on-one with students about many topics, including faith. The conversations seemed so natural, not forced, and even more, kids didn't hesitate to share facts with me; stories about parents divorcing, broken friendships, the loss of a sister...
"Are these conversations really happening?" I thought. They haven't stopped yet.

3. I deeply desire to communicate to people about Jesus.
While listening to Reggie turn Bible passages into fantastic stories, I couldn't ignore the passion stirring inside of me, wanting to do the same. Although I may not be confident in my "Bible knowledge," I am sure that I desire to communicate the stories of Jesus and other Bible characters so that people of any age can better understand, relate, and remember the gospel.

After my first weekend experience, I'll finally get the chance to start in the office this week. With camp "under my belt," I'm anxious to get started.I have the feeling that I'm going to be learning a lot here at CCV, and I'm just getting started!

Arizona, Here We Come!

2009-05-14T00:19:00.009-04:00

I can't believe it's already Thursday!

I sit here, bewildered by the fact that it's 12:20am, and that I'm leaving with my fiance and two friends for Peoria, Arizona in less than 6 hours. Adam and I have both accepted internships at Christ Church of the Valley in youth ministry and children's ministry, respectively. (For any of you who attend CCV in Royersford, PA, we too, are amused at the irony of the name!) Because we'll need a car during our internship, we've decided to begin our trip by driving out west for a few days. Another couple, our friends Damo and Renae, are coming to accompany us on the road trip.

I remember when I thought this day was "months ago!" Time is flying too fast.

We plan to make the trip in three days, hoping to arrive in Peoria Saturday night so that we can attend church on Sunday morning! Come Monday morning, Adam and I are headed to a summer intern retreat in Lost Canyons, AZ at a Young Life Camp.

All four of us will be flying back to Pennsylvania on Thursday afternoon (not landing in PA until 1am Friday morning). While our friends need to start off their own summer, I need to return to Albright to graduate on May 24th, and Adam needs to be in attendance at his sister's wedding on May 30th! Adam and I will be flying back out to Arizona on May 31st to return to our summer internship until mid-August.

We have quite a busy few weeks of travel! Thank you to all of you who have supported, encouraged, and prayed for us. God has provided in many ways. We are driving a safe car across the country(2006 Honda Civic), and have both been blessed with enough finances to support us while we're away this summer.

We are excited to share this journey with you! Don't be strangers-visit our blogs often! We'll certainly have much to tell!

The Golden "A"

2009-05-11T16:26:00.010-04:00

Last night I had the privilege of attending Albright's 2009 "Honors and Awards" Ceremony. This ceremony mainly recognizes seniors whom have made major contributions to the college in areas of academics, arts, and the campus community.

The ceremony was wonderfully organized; accompanied by an early dinner, each award recipient was invited to bring three guests. Inviting my mother, father, and step-mother, my family quickly found a table with my best friend, her mom, and few more of our closest guy neighbors. The night proceeded as planned: different students were recognized for an array of awards, from those within the humanities and education, arts and communication, and the sciences. I was blessed to receive five different awards recognizing my scholastic and campus leadership contributions to Albright College.

The Allen McKenny III Memorial Fund Prize recognized my efforts to contribute to the larger community using my knowledge and skills learned in my study of social sciences (psychology). This recognition probably derived from my my presentation of my senior honors thesis: a proposal of Shine, a non-profit organization, targeted at raising young women's self esteem so that they better understand and love themselves, as they were created.

The Alpha Sigma Phi Award in Memory of Chris Anthony '03 and Andrew Snitzer and the David Caramanica Endowed Memorial Award both recognized qualities of integrity, service, leadership, love and appreciation of life, and a concern and caring for family, friends, and the community at large. I was honored to receive these awards with two of my closest peers, Ryan Krauss and Jared Epler.

The final two awards culminated to what is recognized as Albright's "Golden A."

One award, the Alumni Graduation Honor, recognized my enthusiastic participation in academic, social, and religious activities, influencing and promoting aims and objectives of the college.

Similarly, the Golden A recognizes those whom have enriched the cultural life of the College to promote a more congenial atmosphere.

I write all of this not to boast of my accomplishments, although I am very humbled by the recognition that I have received. Instead, I share this to ponder and reflect upon my feelings after receiving recognition.

I was well aware of my behavior after the awards ceremony, sensing what began an evening of fun, excitement, and encouragement for others transform into a night of comparison, dissatisfaction, and discouragement with myself. Upon leaving the ceremony, congratulating dozens of people (and likewise, receiving congratulations from dozens), I began to conscientiously become aware of the comparisons that I began to make from within. I mostly began to compare myself to a close friend whom graduated last year, a friend whom won three identical awards that I had received last night. I wondered, "What was she recognized for? What did she do that I did not? Whom has really made the greatest contributions to Albright?"

So, I'm significant to Albright's community because I received a "Gold A?"

I think awards ceremonies are ironically somewhat counter-productive. One one hand, they permit an opportunity to recognize students whom have greatly influenced their community. On the other hand, people whom don't receive the awards question their contributions to the college, seeing that they didn't receive a reward to recognize it.

I wonder how that affects people's self esteem.

I know that not receiving an award would tear mine apart.
Yikes, that's not healthy.

Someone once told me that we don't need to worry about trying to save the world.

Jesus has already done that for us.

Sometimes, when my world gets so caught up in ceremonies, graduations, and honors banquets, it's easy to forget where my true worth comes from: my relationship with Christ. This year more than ever before, I've grown to accept, understand, and cherish the love God has for me, the intention in which he's created me, and the specific gifts that he's given (or not given) me. Yet, sometimes, I can't help but notice how it's so much easier, so much more tangible, so much more believable to hold up a plaque or an award or a giant check and say, "I'm worthy to be recognized because _______________ (fill in the blank)."

Moments like these challenge me. I am so proud to have been recognized for my efforts at Albright. I love my alma mater and its community deeply. Yet, I must realize that my time in college will pass, much sooner than later. My awards will eventually yellow, the shine on my plaques will eventually fade, and eventually (probably sooner than later, too) my reward money will be all spent.

After all, those awards are just things.

What will never fade nor squander is the recognition, the love, and the admiration that I receive from my Creator. Sure, the recognition may not be so easily tangible nor easy to believe at the really hard times but it will never fade. I am left to eternity knowing I am a "very, very good," one-of-a-kind, 5'3," loud, energetic, and enthusiastic-Melissa Marie Jaworski-creation of God.

"...for we are God's masterpiece..." (NLT)

God's masterpiece.

Created intentionally to be used by Him.

For eternity.

So, what's the big deal with this Gold A?

I'm honored.

But, my treasures are heaven-bound.

Digital Portfolio

2009-04-21T21:38:00.005-04:00

With a lot of patience and great help from some loved ones-or one-I've just finished my Digital Portfolio! Give it a look, especially if you're connected to a school district that's hiring!
(Hint: Click the picture!)

2009-04-21T21:38:00.001-04:00

Uniquely ME!

2009-04-21T00:43:00.003-04:00

As I've been cramming to finish my senior thesis paper for my Albright College honors graduation credit, I was browsing around on the Girls Scouts & Dove "uniquely ME!" campaign site. I ran across a video I remember seeing at a conference a few years ago. Take a look!

Senior Spotlight

2009-04-20T16:38:00.003-04:00

I recently just submitted some answers for a "Senior Spotlight" section in my college's upcoming newspaper publication. These past few weeks have been so emotional, thinking about graduating and leaving my friends at school. Although I haven't had time to record my thoughts here regarding the mess of things that are going on in my life now, I thought that including some of my answers here would be more than appropriate. Enjoy!

Senior Spotlight Survey

Name: Melissa Jaworski (MJ)

Major: Elementary Education/Psychology

Hometown: Schwenksville, PA

After Graduation Plans:

Five days after graduation, my fiancé and I will fly out to Arizona to pursue internships at a mega-church of 10,000 people in Phoenix. Upon completing our programs, he’ll return to school at Eastern University while I sign on with Campus Outreach Services, an agency that aims to promote safe and healthy decisions in teens and young adults around the nation. If all goes well, I’ll be speaking to students across America about topics concerning dating, body image, diversity, etc. I’ll be substituting on the side for a bit of extra cash too! Come May 2010, I’ll be “Melissa Flora” (from MJ to MF-go figure), and my husband Adam and I will set off together to continue our adventure of life!

What will you miss most about Albright?

EVERYTHING! A better question is, “What WON’T I miss is a better question?” From beautiful days on campus to chaotic gatherings in the campus center, I’ll miss being within Albright’s culture 24-7. I’ll miss never again getting to give another Albright tour or the opportunity to sit on a student panel at an Open House. I’ll miss riding the pony with my POPs to gathering in the Campus Center for experience events, conferences, and meetings. I’ll miss late nights at the library, early morning workouts in the Schumo, and every administrator, faculty, and student with whom I built relationships with throughout my years at Albright. Yes, I’ll even miss the cafeteria food, especially the pineapples and the cookies. Most of all, though, I’ll miss being called an “Albright student,” knowing my experience at Albright will never again be the same.

What advice would you give to an incoming freshmen?

College is such an emotional time. Some of us are so excited to “start over” with new friends and opportunities, while others of us are greatly missing boyfriends and our favorite hometown hang out spots. When you come to college, it’s a new opportunity, so embrace it! Your college experience will only be as great as you allow it to be. Make the most of your time at Albright through opportunities and friendship; take risks, challenge yourself, and live your experience without any regrets!

How do you want to be remembered after you graduate?

I suppose I want to remembered just as I am now: as spunky, energetic, fun-loving, and caring MJ. “THAT’S ME!” (Pointing to myself as Amanda Bynes of Nickelodeon’s All That.) I want to be remembered as someone who loves opportunities, love adventures, and most of all, loves people, especially Albright’s people.

If you had three wishes, what would they be?

1. Is it cheating to wish for an infinite amount of wishes?

2. I would wish that Brian Dawkins is still a Philadelphia Eagle.

2. I would wish that every person would experience the joy of genuinely being loved and

loving themselves.

If you could go back to when you were a freshmen, what would you do differently?

-I would not have let my insecurities get the best of me when choosing to join organizations, lead peers, and be open-minded to new friendships. Specifically, I wouldn’t have dropped pledging a sorority. I would have applied to become an RA. I would have worked at Albright for conferences during the summer, and I would have randomly sat at any lunch table during meals to build friendships with people.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

In 10 years, I see myself as old. I’ll be 32-yuck. On the positive side, I see myself as very happily married, cultured by traveling around the world, educated with at least a Master’s Degree, and an upcoming national public speaker. Wow, I’ll probably be a mom, too. Next question, please?

What is your favorite experience at Albright College?

Honestly, there are too many to list. I know that leaving Albright won’t be one of them.

Picture Perfect!

2009-04-05T21:53:00.004-04:00

As I walked through my apartment door earlier tonight, I was greeted by two of my roommates who were excited to share a "fun fact" with me! Check out Albright's latest advertisement! It's picture perfect with all three of us together!

The Vagina Monologues

2009-03-29T19:46:00.008-04:00

Today I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to support one of my roommates in a performance sponsored by two Albright College campus organizations. My roommate did a wonderful job in her piece, and the event was outstanding; educational, entertaining, and inspiriting, my heart swelled with school spirit as I watched thirty female Albright students and alumnus perform for an audience of over 200 students and sponsors!

Hence the title, The Vagina Monologues, the 90 minute benefit production celebrated "V-Day," a "global movement to end violence against women and girls. (The 'V' in V-Day stand for Victory, Valentine, and Vagina.) Performed by my peers, small skits and monologues entailing humorous, ironic, and poetic descriptions of the vagina encouraged audience members (both male and female) to celebrate the uniqueness of femininity and "respond against violence toward women." Some of the monologue titles included:

The "Wear and Say" List (If your vagina could talk, what would it say?)
My Angry Vagina
A Six-Year Old Girl was Asked...
My Vagina was a Village
The Woman Who Loved to Make Vaginas Happy

Each monologue celebrated women of all types: old women, young women, Hispanic women, African-American women, lesbian women, women with "positive experiences," women with "not-so-positive experiences," etc. Monologues were based upon Eve Ensler's award-winning publication The Vagina Monologues. She is also the founder/artistic director of V-Day, and is currently working on a new book of monologues, I am an Emotional Creature to be published in 2010. Based upon information given in a V-Day brochure, students learned of the purpose, mission, and awareness of V-Day and were given an opportunity to take action in various ways.

On a more personal note, I was astounded to witness how many Albright students came to support the event. I thought that my roommate (in case you're confused because you thought I went to see my roommate, I actually have 3 roommates!) and I were lucky enough to grab seats when we arrived 15 minutes prior to the event, but people continued to flood the room until 15 minutes after the event was schedule to begin! The V-Day girls were delighted to continue expanding seating for their audience. Even more, when the performance began, I again was flabbergasted by the young women's acting skills! Despite how shy or introverted some of the women may appear on campus, each actress was not afraid to speak loudly, clearly, and eccentrically, even adding witty motions and perfectly-planned pauses to dramatize their monologues! I laughed and applauded enthusiastically after each performance; appreciating the concord that was shared and celebrated by each woman in the room. There is no doubt that I've gained some new perspective on the uniqueness and creativity entailed in being a woman.

If you're interested in exploring the "V-Day Movement" in greater depth, check out their website: http://www.vday.org.

What Happened to my Money?

2009-03-17T21:01:00.005-04:00

I am officially more broke than I've ever been before.

It's quite an interesting experience, to say in the least.

Since I've begun student teaching, I have not had an opportunity to earn money. Any campus jobs of giving tours or working at the fitness center have been replaced by my time spent with small children (although this is a joke because the majority of children are my size, especially now that I'm in a 6th grade placement). My job at a city after-school program has been replaced with after-school meetings and planning periods. For the first time since I've taken responsibility for my spending, I'm experiencing spending without earning.

The above situation is never a good scenario. Most logical people try to spend money they earn, and even then, that's not always the intention. Because of my need to still pay for gas and food, I've been using my savings to "dish out the dirt," and the money is going quick. Just last night, I was spending some time in Walmart, shopping for a few essentials for this week. Seeing that my college is on "spring break," the college dining service is not providing us with any food for the week (usually I have a 7 meal "flex). Thus, with only a few dollars to spend (my debit card has been out-of-commission for a few weeks-long story), I found myself buying the infamous "cheap foods:" Ramen noodles (12 packs for $2.00), Ramen "to-go" packs (6 for $2.00, perfect for school lunches), a pack of 6 bagels ($2.00), and two boxes of cereal for $3.50. When I arrived at the counter, I found myself wondering what others thought about my purchases. Did they know that I was running low on money? What did they think about me? While pulling out $3.00 worth of change, I even thought, "how embarrassing that I'm paying with change."

It's funny how quick we are to judge others based upon money, sometimes.

Luckily, my thoughts about others opinions and my "embarrassment" quickly subsided with the reality that I just don't have money! A huge aspect of growing comfortable with who I am has been redirecting my thoughts when I naturally surrender to culture's falsity that my outward appearance or performance categorizes my character. These moments have served as the loudest reminders that my worth, my purpose, and "who I am" derives from my faith in God's intentional creation of me and my comfor that he "sees me" as I am-regardless of my circumstance.

After my fiance introduced me to a budget excel worksheet that he created last summer, I've since been recording my spending. I've watched how I've been finding ways to make ends meet without spending dollars on unnecessary items (mostly food trips and occasional shopping trips). Here are some thoughts/reflections/etc regarding my recent personal recession:

I really don't need as much as I think. Neither do I need as much as I want.
It's interesting how simple shopping becomes when you know you do not have the money to afford careless buying. My recent shopping trips for food have become much quicker, as I'm easily able to breeze by particular aisles, knowing "I just can't afford that now."
I'm extremely thankful for the times when my parents hand me a $20 bill for gas or offer food from the house. I love you Mom, Dad, and Nancy! Who ever said that part of the relationship had to end when I graduate college? ;)
There are many ways to be creative with spending-and there are many ways to find loopholes to spending! I'm learning the art of finding resources, especially including friends and family).
I love/hate money. ;)

Ironically, I've found some peace in my "money-less" situation, and have even enjoyed the experience as a test of humility and integrity.

Of course, that's not to say that I expect to live this way forever. In fact, being in this state has pushed me to better understand what my financial situation will be like after college. I just recently read a "life after college explained" book from our alumni office, which discusses saving/earning/spending money, taxes, apartment shopping, job issues, etc. I'm fortunate that my fiance is well-aware of the need for communication about these important topic. Not to mention that we are also well-aware that we have a wedding to pay for! (Talk about creative ways to spend-or not spend, as we prefer.)

I'm excited to see how this experience challenges me to grow; hopefully in wisdom and financially! ;)

Teaching Moment

2009-03-09T20:52:00.002-04:00

I walked out of my student teaching classroom Friday positive that "public school teaching wasn't my gig."

My students were complaining, whining, and making it obvious that they wanted nothing to do with three tests we were scheduled to take during our language arts period. After having at least a dozen students talk back to me, handing out more than my comfortable "two" demerits (a disciplinary consequence-I'm a whimp), and feeling as if I were talking-and teaching-to the walls, I was nearly in tears.

I came home and slept for three hours.

On a Friday night.

Lame.

Thus, I wasn't shocked when admist performing a drama on stage for children's ministry on Sunday morning (one of my favorite things to do), when asked how my student teaching experience was coming along, I easily answered, "fine...ok. I definitely don't think I'm meant to teach in school."

Little did I know then that Monday would be such a great day.

What a change.

Children are so bizarre. They can hate you one minute-and then the next, be laughing right alongside you. I don't understand them. I was convinced that all of my students hated school on Friday, yet today, I was blown away by how incredible their behavior, interest, and cooperation was.

Even while teaching a terribly difficult geometry lesson (which included over three pages of overhead notes), they were patient, on-task, and enthusiastic to participate. I found myself enjoying "making learning fun" for them-using them as manipulatives, pointing out parallel and perpendicular objects in the classroom, etc.

In fact, I was so impressed by their behavior that I introduced them to a fun "high 5 game" that I learned during educational theatre. Note: 5th grade is the PERFECT age to play the "high 5 game." My teacher was even impressed and thanked me for teaching her a new game!

After the game, the students were able to calm down, jump right back on task, and even partipciated MORE than in the previous math lesson! I was overjoyed to find that mixing in a little 'fun" transition time for the kids (especially for kids that don't have recess) promoted their attitude towards learning.

"See, I can do this," I thought.

A few hours later, I was reading one of my cooperating teacher's comments in my response journal. She wrote, "You will make a fabulous teacher. I would be honored to have you teach on our (5th grade) team."

Today was a good day. In addition to the above, I received an "A" for my first placement grade and was asked by another faculty member if I was planning to apply to work for the school. (I was already asked by the principal and have prepared my resume and cover letter.)

So, am I really "not meant to teach in school?"

Back to square one?

Oh, the possibilities.

Oh well, I'd rather have too many options than none at all. :)

Smile! You're Engaged!

2009-03-02T22:21:00.005-05:00

I have a new "banner" that runs across the background of my phone. It reads:

For several of you whom are friends of both Adam and myself, many of you may have read about our engagement story on his blog, The Adventurer. If you haven't gotten a chance to read it, take a few minutes now to indulge yourself in the "mini-romance."

As today dates us to three weeks since the proposal, I find myself still in shock about my updated "relationship status." I sheepishly admit, I find myself gawking at my ring with my friends numerous times, moving my finger up and down, left to right, especially in areas where the lighting is stellar! (Our church building is one of these places!) My peers within my campus organizations tease me, asking me to not "pull the engagement card." I find myself retelling the story to complete strangers (such as this past weekend when I led a teenage girls' workshop on accountability and mentors), and I still have friends congratulating me!

Here are some of the silliest changes that I've had to grown used to since receiving "the ring:"

Seeing my new Facebook relationship status read "engaged." Ahh!!
Having a sudden desire to not wear gloves. (Joking-it was 18 degrees today.)
Always wanting to wave or shake people's hand with my left hand. (Okay, just kidding!)
Feeling as if my left hand is a bit heavier than my right. (Again, kidding.)
Needing to find ways to readjust my wrist so that when I lean against my hand I'm not gashing my face. (Not kidding. It hurts sometimes! I'll stand the pain, though!)
Being extra cautious to not knock my ring against furniture, walls, or objects in fear of damaging it-even though it's nearly harmless!
Being extra cautious to not knock my ring against furtniture, walls, or objects because my diamond is just so BIG! ;)
Taking my ring off when I use cleaning products-and then remembering to put it back on!
Using a toothbrush and toothpaste to occasionally, just occassionally clean my ring. (Obsessed, I know.)

With all jokes aside concerning the ring, I'm excited to celebrate this next period of my life with Adam. More than any shine, shimmer, or sparkle that the ring projects, I treasure it because it is a symbol of his love and commitment to me. I value Adam's investment in the purchase of the ring-he had been changing and rearranging the ring and making payments on it for more than year and a half! Yet, I value more his investment in our relationship as a couple: our communication, team-work, and perseverance to encourage and support each other in what we're bested gifted and passionate to pursue.

With all of the excitement of wedding planning, I value that Adam is constantly redirecting my focus to concentrate less on the wedding and more on the marriage. While planning how we'll spend our time together within this next year or while brainstorming specific details for the wedding, he reminds me that our wedding day should not be regarded as our highest priority because it will be our relationship that lasts our lifetime that we'll need to extend our greatest efforts towards.

I'm extremely grateful that I'm committing to celebrate and adventure through life with Adam. I'm attracted to his passion, enthusiasm, and love for other people. (I'm focusing on the interior here, the exterior attraction speaks for itself!) He offers me moments of simplicity and celebration when I forget to "schedule" them in myself. He has helped me to view life as an "adventure," and how to love it! I am excited for us to continue to use our gifts and strengths to draw each other closer to "just be" with God.

Big plans are ahead for us two....and I'm excited to share them with the wonderful community that embraces and celebrates life alongside us.

Teaching Frustrations.

2009-02-23T20:26:00.011-05:00

Today in the realm of student teaching, my responsibilities have increased immensely. I now teach Reading Acceleration, Math, Writing Acceleration, Reading, and Language Arts. Although one may think I'm excited to finally experience a realistic teaching role, I've contained some thoughts that make me think otherwise.

Take a look.

Some of the things that frustrate me about teaching include:

The amount of paper that is wasted on worksheets throughout the day.
The amount of time that goes into preparing a lesson that only gets 10 minutes attention in class (and then is thrown out afterwards). It reminds me of taking thirty minutes to wrap a Christmas present only so it can be torn in thirty seconds the next morning.
Feeling like I need to babysit children all day long just so to make sure they don't call each other "stupid."
How you can look for a resource for hours and still find nothing. What a waste of time! I totally could be investing in wedding planning during those hours.
How ridiculously tired and exhausted I feel at 5pm. I thought I was 22, not 122.
Not feeling as if I have time to enjoy time with my friends (or for myself) because I'm constantly typing up lesson plans that also waste paper and time. Don't school districts understand anything about "going green?"
The fear that at the age of 22 I will soon sound like a 60 year old woman who's been smoking for 40 years because of the number of times I need to raise my voice.
Being afraid to wake up from a nap from 5:30pm-7:30pm because I know that when I awake, I'll be 12 hours closer to Tuesday morning, trapped in a school from 8am-4pm.
This nagging feeling that I can't be my whole self in the classroom. I'd rather be dancing and singing on a stage any day than standing in front of a classroom counting down to from 3 to gather students' attention.
Feeling as if a passion that I've held since I've been 5 years old is dying inside of me.

Thank God for a gift in public speaking.

BIG: Come and See

2009-02-08T21:06:00.008-05:00

I just returned home from a weekend retreat, Quest 2009; InterVarsity Christian Fellowship's Winter Weekend Retreat for the Northeast PA Region. It was phenomenal, energizing, and humbling, to say in the least.

As an extrovert, I adore conferences. I love the amounts of people, I love the energy, I love how worship, talks, activities, and "hang out" time events are planned 100x "bigger" than usual weekly meetings.

And when I think big, I dream of hundreds, even thousands attending one conference.

Yet, what I love-and what challenges me- about InterVarsity's conferences are that they're normally not larger than 100 students, if that. Even with 5 different campuses attending, we had less than this number. And yet, I found the opportunity, community, and authenticity develop and dwell within the group of staff and students whom gathered together in the cabin.

Because of the size of our group, we were able to experience powerful worship where, when singing together, we sounded as if there were hundreds of us, yet when glancing to the left or right, you couldn't help but smile at the genuine intimacy shared in the worship experience. Even more, when it came time to "express yourself" with clapping, dancing, and throwing your hands up to God, no one was afraid to act. I must admit that conference has been one of the most vivid circumstances in which I recall not thinking twice about "what my friends will think" when dancing and throwing my arms up to God.

Because of the size of our group, we were able to engage in activities in which we gathered together to experience scripture. When discussing John 2 and Jesus' turning water into wine, we decorated the entire basement with 908 paper cut outs of wine bottles to represent the 180 gallons in the Jewish purification jars. Later that night, we celebrated Jesus' promise that "he unexpectedly provides the best and the most" by dancing to Jewish music with 40 people in a giant circle, creating a nine foot-long banana split, and playing twister with 15 different twister boards. Crowded, yet intimate.

Because of the size of our group, we were able to reflect on how "Jesus always sees us" no matter where we're at in life-good or bad-not only individually, but in small groups. We were able to spend genuine time sharing and praying in those groups, and then even prayed for people who made decisions as a larger group.

Experiencing Jesus within this group-truly experiencing Jesus within this group has influenced my thoughts about "conference sizes."

Yet, as I'm always imagining my future and seeking critical interests in others whom share my passions, I could not ignore the observations I recorded concerning the conferees speakers. The speakers were a married couple, both very talented at their gift of communicating, whom reach us students in a variety of ways; humor, emotions, both! While listening their approaches, considering their prep time, and fascinating at their abundance of stories, I began to wonder, "How would I feel speaking at a conference with 70 students? Is that impressive? What does it say about your talent as a speaker? Should I even be thinking about that? Do they even think about that? What's wrong with me?"

Too many times I get caught up in this idea of "big."

Especially when it comes to thinking about my future.

And why do I really love "big" anyway? Is it because I love that so many people are being invited to "come and see" Jesus? Or is it because my experience of "big" creates a false illusion of worth, value, and uniqueness?

Guilty: #2.

As an extrovert, I'm energized by massive amounts of people. Yet, in my journey of self-discovery and understanding how God's wired me to serve in my future, I need to be authentic in my love and desire to one day be apart of "big events." Whether that means being on staff at a big church, speaking at big conferences, or becoming a part of an international ministry, it means realizing that I'm not who I am because of the size of the events that I speak at. I'm who I am because of the one I choose to speak about while at these events.

And as I learned this weekend, as I continue on this "quest" to know Jesus better,"

Jesus promises that he will unexpectedly provide the best and the most (John 2).

Jesus sees me all the time and loves me anyway (John 4).

Jesus has invited me to "come and see" life with him (John 1).

And whether BIG or small, size indifferent, I'm being called to somehow- whether by speaking, teaching, or serving-invite others to do the same.

"Come and see."

Not to come and hear me, Melissa Jaworski.

But to come and see Jesus, the living God.

Urban Education

2009-02-03T22:30:00.003-05:00

I've just completed my first official week of student teaching.

Well, I suppose I shouldn't say "official." I did have a snow day on my "official" start day.

Regardless, I feel as if I've been student teaching for a month.

Let me share some of my initial thoughts with ya'll.

By special request, I've been placed in a local inner-city urban school. The school is one of fourteen elementary schools in the district. By the time students advance to the district high school, they are 1 of 5,000 students. (That's more than twice my college population!) The school population is heavily diverse; African American, Latino, or Caucasian, etc. In fact, many students move from Puerto Rico, the Dominican, or Mexico to this city specifically for employment purposes! Most of the classes in the school have between 20-25 students, and most of the teachers are Caucasian females. I believe there are about 5 or 6 male teachers.

Beyond the general demographics of the school population, certain details pertaining to the specific culture of inner city education may shock you. With the exception of the 6th grade “magnet schools," no students in the entire district are bussed to their respective schools. Even in elementary schools, the majority of students walk to school. These students arrive at school at 8:30am and are not dismissed until 3:10pm without a single break from doing school-work. Because of wavering PSSA scores, administrators have cut recess from students' schedules to allow for more curriculum, teaching, and PSSA preparation time. Certain subjects such as science and social studies are sacrificed in lieu of preparing students for reading and math proficiency. Students are required to complete daily PSSA computer prep, while some participate after-school in additional PSSA preparation.

In this city, students are used to change. Due to rent payments, monetary issues, or other related causes, families will often move to different parts of the city. Thus, it is not uncommon for students to miss school for several days (or sometimes) weeks in a row! Even more, it is not uncommon for students to change elementary schools mid-year or for students to have attended 3-4 different elementary schools before their fourth-grade year. My cooperating teacher told me a story about how one year she had a class of 28 students, and by the end of her school year, only 8 of those 28 students were her original students assigned in September of that school year.

“Melissa, welcome to inner-city education.”

In the week that I’ve shadowed my cooperating teacher, I’ve gained knowledge about the frustrations, discouragements, and challenges of inner-city education. I’ve watch teachers cry over low PSSA scores and burnt-out teachers scream in frustration. I’ve gained knowledge of the hindrance of uncooperative and apathetic students and parents, language barriers, inadequate funding, inopportune resources, lack of budgeting, etc.

The teachers on my team laugh because of how I’ve been “tainted” by this experience.

And so, you’re probably wondering, when will I be running away screaming?

If I plan to stay in education, that’ll be…

Right around…

Never.

Despite the horror stories, the language barriers, the inadequate funding, inopportune resources, lack of budgeting, etc. I could a more desirable environment in which to teach.

With each new challenge that is presented before me, I’m encouraged and inspired to teach in this particular city. I’ve asked the teachers to tell me as much as possible about the reality of their jobs. I’ve told the teachers that I won’t be scared by anything they have to share. If I pursue education, I will teach in an urban environment.

I will help reveal to these students that they are valuable.

That they are loved.

And that they have purpose.

“She’s so naïve,” they think.

Perhaps. I mean, I do think that I can make a difference in the lives of many.

Challenges won’t stop that.

After all, why choose to be cynical about a passion to love others?

Snow Day

2009-01-28T22:38:00.004-05:00

I predicted it.

I was going to have a snow day on my first day of student teaching.

I woke up this morning at 4:30am, pulling the blinds back to my apartment parking lot dressed in inches of white. "Snow day!" I cheered to myself as I jumped back in bed. I later woke around 6:15am to confirm my suspicion, and was enthusiastically congratulated when "Reading School District" flashed across the screen.

No one is ever too old to have a snow day.

Rather than spending my Wednesday observing a 5th grade class at my first placement; Northwest Elementary School, I finished an internship application for InterVarsity Christian Fellowship; a possible job opportunity for next year. I was thankful to have the time to thoroughly complete the application, along with some time to enjoy shopping with my roommate Sarah and scrapbooking while watching a movie with my roommate Nadine.

After completing the application, I turned to Nadine to share an answer with her, remarking that "sometimes we have no idea just how impactful we are as part of God's plans until we answer a question about it."

"We don't give ourselves enough credit," I told her.

Not that witnessing or discipling or journeying alongside someone as they come to know Jesus is about "giving ourselves credit," it's just that sometimes, we don't think that we "really make a difference" when in fact, we do.

Take a look at the response I shared with Nadine:

Name one person, not a follower of Jesus at the time, with whom you’ve talked during this school year about following Jesus. In what ways did you speak and model the Gospel to this person? What happened?

This past semester, my best friend and I decided to co-lead a small group for some upper-classmen women. One of these ladies in particular has been a close friend of mine since freshmen year. In the past, knowing she wasn’t a follower of Jesus, but seemed interested in why I was, I’ve comforted or encouraged her with scripture, discussed with her some major apocalyptic questions, and even bought her a Bible for herself. I invited her to large group Albright Christian Fellowship meetings, which she attended a few times throughout freshmen year before stopping, and to our first camping retreat that same year. I’ve taken her to Hope’s Hangout, an after-school program which serves inner-city youth. Whenever hanging out, whether at dinner, at a game night, or at a party, I’ve always been conscious to model other aspects of the Gospel to her (and others) through demonstrating a loving, caring, and respectful attitude towards myself and others.

This year, she immediately accepted the small group invitation, exclaiming that she and another friend were “just talking about wanting to do something like this.” Since the small group has begun she has hardly missed a meeting. Within small group time, we catch up on “life details,” discuss scripture, pray, and watch Grey’s Anatomy together. (I’ve learned to tolerate the show; the things I do for Jesus!) Prompting the group with questions and discussion, my friend has eagerly asked questions of her own; bringing up points of confusion and discussing significant pieces to the passages in response to the prompts. She loved learning that Jesus’ first miracle involved turning water into wine: Jesus wants us to have fun, and learning that Jesus is not a boring, soft-spoken, pacifist as conveyed in a Vintage-21 You Tube video, but an intelligent, risk-taking, and creative person! She even takes notes during discussion!

My friend and I spend time outside of small group together, too. We’ll sometimes eat dinner together, attend a party together, or head to the bar with some friends on the weekend. During these times, we’ll not always have direct conversation about Jesus or faith, but she’ll tell me stories about how her and her friend decided to give up gossiping or how my relationship with her boyfriend has served as a positive model for her relationship with her boyfriend. She’s expressed interest in continuing a small group this semester, and has admitted during some reflection time in small group that “it’s easy for her to read the gospel and be amazed at Jesus, but it’s hard for her to think about changing a lot of her lifestyle choices if she ‘follows Jesus.’” I’m excited to continue to walk alongside my friend as she adventures through this next part of her journey. I know that she’ll forever be a great friend of mine, and her journey with Jesus has been both inspirational and encouraging.

I never realized the impact that my friendship with my friend could have with her relationship with Jesus. All this time, I felt guilty because I had "not done enough" to share the gospel with her, yet what I didn't realize was that God's been working in my friend's heart for four years-regardless of my awareness.

Wanting our friends to love and know Jesus as we do, too many times we "beat ourselves up" because we "don't do enough." It's important to remember that before Jesus began quoting any scripture, he formed relationships with the people around him. He dined with them (Mark 2), sincerely listened to them (John 4), and empathized with others over the death of a friend (John 11).

People were fascinated by what he had to say because he was relational with them first.

As I continue to enjoy reflecting on the relationships which God has blessed me with, I pray that I can follow Jesus not only in attitude and love, but in his model for ministry.

What Jesus Didn't Do

2009-01-26T22:52:00.003-05:00

Below is an article by Nathan Plye that the leadership team of my campus' InterVarsity Christian Fellowship read and discussed during our pre-semester training this past Sunday. Ironically (or not-so-ironically) the article raises some pretty interesting discussion starters about limitations and expectations; two issues that are recently "hot" on my personal reflection radar. The article can be found on relevantmagaizine.org.

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If you wanted to meet every American in your lifetime, you’d have about 10 seconds to shake hands with each person and exchange names.

It would take one hundred years. You couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, and most importantly couldn’t wash your hands. (I bet you’d get real sick.)

In other words, it would be impossible. There is no way you could meet every single American in your lifetime. I was pondering this fact recently when someone told me that the world population at the time of Jesus was likely similar to that of modern day America.

After considering this for a while, I came to a bold conclusion. Steady yourself. Call me crazy, but I concluded that Jesus did not meet every person on Earth in his 30-plus years here. I’m not saying He couldn’t have. I’m just saying He probably didn’t. Now, certainly He ministered to hundreds and thousands; Scripture is clear about that. But the larger part of the world He probably never spoke to. It’s likely there were sick people that He didn’t heal, miserable people He didn’t comfort and hungry people He never fed.

I think there is something important to learn here, but we must be clear. As we read the gospels, we see Jesus always quick to heal anyone who came to Him. He wasn’t running away from crowds or screaming at the mob of lepers like in the famous scene in Jesus Christ Superstar.

He was more than willing and able. It’s just that He had only a certain amount of time and a certain group of people to whom He was called to minister. And that’s it. He came to do His Father’s will and nothing else.

It may sound strange to say it, but the idea has lifted a great burden off my shoulders since it came into my mind. Jesus, whom we are to imitate, had a finite to-do list in His earthly life.

So do you.

You can’t feed every AIDS orphan. You won’t house every homeless person you pass. There are thousands of cities you should never visit and billions of people out there that you are not meant to minister to. You should find peace in this. I do. In fact–this may sound callous–but I find peace in the ability, when I’m passing so many people on the street, to say to myself, “I may or may not minister to you.”

It seems crazy, right? But I know I’m not the only one who has felt this weight. Like my buddy Chad said, “When I chose my kid for Compassion International, I felt like the guy in the pet store who wants to take home every single puppy.”

But we can’t. And we shouldn’t–we’re on a team. We all need to be reminded of this because there is a certain tendency for sensitivity to go hand in hand with an egotistical and absurd belief that it is my job is to save the world. But if St. Paul said it once he said it a million times: you are a part of the whole. You play your part and only your part.

That’s a relief. I couldn’t even meet everybody in my own country, much less remember their names. (I know this because my record is remembering just 5 new names at once–I set it just this past Sunday during the turn-and-greet part of the service.)

God has indeed called us to go and preach the Gospel to everyone. But understand this: Christ’s earthly ministry set an example for us in its limits. You are to play your specific role in the body of Christ just as, when He was here on earth, He played His role in the body of Christ.

Can it be said too often? Look to Jesus as your model. We must find our role if we are to accomplish His redemptive plan. Once we find our fit, we as a body can link arms and form a giant chain to sweep across the land and search for every lost soul like all the townies looking for Jim Carrey in The Truman Show.

We are inseparably linked. In this knowledge, I find freedom. It’s a different kind of freedom, being linked to the whole. But it’s the best kind. So it is, whenever I pass people on the street, I can say, “I may or may not minister to you, but somebody will.”

Because I’m on team that will not lose. And I can rest in this truth.

Graffiti Board

2009-01-22T23:44:00.011-05:00

My final class at Albright College will finish tomorrow.

I'm done classes at Albright.

Forever.

It has been quite an enjoyable "interim" (January term). As I described in a previous post, it has been a time for me to rejoice in "MJ time," celebrate friendship with others, and work on my "domestic skills" of cooking. With the exception of the cooking thing, I met my goals efficiently, and after some final presentations in class tomorrow, my interim will cease.

I'm excited about my final project. It's objective was very appropriate for the last project that I'll ever create for an Albright class. The project required us students to create anything, whether a game, poem, dance, painting, etc. to symbolize our personal growth throughout the class. Tomorrow, each student is expected to share his/her project with the class.

I chose to do some graffiti for my project.

Not real graffiti of course (I'm not that talented), but instead, I represented my feelings through an activity called a "graffiti board." This activity was introduced within our education theatre class. It's similar to a brainstorming web; a topic is written in the middle of a board, piece of paper, etc. and participants are invited to come and record words, pictures, etc. to represent their ideas about that topic. For example, if the central topic is food, one could draw a picture of a pizza slice, write "Chinese food," or do a combination of both! With the topic of "educational theatre, my final project ended up looking a bit like this:

Organized chaos at first glance, hunh? It's interesting, however, because as one chooses to admire the graffiti a bit closer, one can see that a theme of words and numbers draw itself across the posterboard from 1-15. Each of these days, separate by by different colored shapes (day 1 is a blue square, day 2 is a light blued circle, day 3 is a green square, etc.) summarizes a "theme" for what was learned that day.

What I loved about this project was that it challenged me to understand the value of moments of reflection and expressing that reflection in ways that illustrate intentional periods of growth.

I suppose that's not completely true. I've always been aware that reflection is valuable, I just never have taken the time out of my schedule to do it.

This has always been a problem in my personal journey of understanding myself and coming to know Jesus. While I've always been quick to adventure on self-discovery by enthusiastically joining clubs, meeting new people, and taking risks, I've never quite taken the time to reflect on such opportunities and experiences. Instead, I always find myself too exhausted from the day's events to record a special moment or to ponder a theme that summarizes my growth for the day.

Even more, I hardly make time to quietly sit with God in prayer or to reflect on Jesus' teachings so that I can record a special moment or ponder a theme that summarizes my growth or understanding with Him.

If you want to grow in understanding yourself and Jesus, not reflecting is not an option.

Not making the time to reflect-to record a thought, to sit and think about the day, to make quiet time for prayer or hearing from God is unacceptable. Understandable, it's hard work. Many times, whether it be before the day's agenda or after a night's activities, we're too tired to sit and reflect- it's just one more thing to do! And yet, we wonder how our life can feel so "purposeless" when we fill it with activities, service, and "good, Christ-like" things to help others comes to known Jesus.

When seeking God's word, scripture reminds us that God speaks to us in whispers.

The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by."Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. ( 1 Kings 19:11-13).

I want to be okay with have moments of silence, quiet, and reflection.

I want to hear God speak to me in whispers.

I think I'll continue to jot down a word or two to summarize a "theme" for my day. I'll expect that these records will extremely helpful over the next few weeks. Perhaps some of them will appear in my blog, or perhaps, I'll have to make another graffiti board.

Perfection

2009-01-19T23:25:00.005-05:00

I just finished a very interesting conversation over the phone with Adam. After Adam mentioned that he was bored, I enthusiastically began asking him a few "romantic questions" from a cheesy couples' question dating book that I grabbed a few years ago. After a few "warm up" questions, ene of the questions asked, "What is one personality trait that you possess that is a bit out of the norm compared to others around you?"

I chose to discuss my "personality trait" to constantly drive after perfection within everything I do. Although Adam has been well-aware of this personality trait since he read an essay I had written in my junior year of high school pertaining to "my" Scarlet Letter (a "P" for Perfectionist), I proceeded to explain how I aim to externally display to others a (false) sense of perfectionism. Whether one were to walk through my unusually-tidy college apartment, marvel at my unique collection of photographs and keepsakes from significant events in my life (homecoming, prom, birthdays, etc.), or simply come across me in passing, I confess this egocentric, unrealistic, and downright disgusted desire for others to envy me.

I told Adam, "I want people to look at me, read about me in the newspaper, hear about me in friends' conversations, and say, 'I want her life.'"

Of course, I realize the immaturity-and in insincerity- in that statement. I feel even worse knowing that I've published this blog and anyone could be reading my confession. Yet, I desire to no longer define myself by such measures-perfection-or false motivations that are likewise self-serving. My blog is one about my journey to understand who God has created me to be, when no one's looking.

Who am I when no-one's looking?

The first step to solving a problem is admitting you have a problem, right?

I have a problem with self-image.

If you were to catch me a real vulnerable moment, as Adam had, I'd confess that I care too much what others think about me and thus, I'm motivated to participate in organizations, programs, and opportunities to boost my personal reputation. I want to be in the most ambitious clubs, collect the most elite recognitions, and transcend every one's expectation of "the best." Even as I confess these things here on this blog, I still want my post to seem "perfect."

Ouch. That's ugly. (And quite time-consuming.)

But, really, honestly, if I were to strip myself of my fear that without my achievements, recognition, and reputation I'd be "nobody," I'd admit that I really want to not have to join so many clubs or complete so many programs to "feel" as if I'm "someone worthy to recognize." I want to not care what Albright College has to commemorate me with when I walk across the stage on graduation day. I want to be confident that I'm a beautiful creation of God because I'm a beautiful creation of God-and nothing more.

I want to be confident that what I do does not define who I am.

For some reason, I feel this self-image/comparisons/perfectionist issue really hits home for women, especially. Although Jesus is a wonderful example of someone who's demonstrated self-confidence in who he is and not by what he does, I feel led to look at a woman role model for this issue.

Immediately, I am drawn to the Mary/Martha story shared in Luke 10; a story of two sisters and their interaction with Jesus. As Martha busies herself with preparing the house and meal for Jesus, Mary chooses to "sit at the Lord's feet listening to what He said" (Luke 10:40).

I want to be a Mary. I want to just sit at the Lord's feet and know that I am his.

I don't want to be a Martha. I dont' want to feel as if the only way I feel significant is if I busy myself with measurable and accomplishable tasks.

How do I learn to sit at the Lord's feet? And what other female role models are there to admire within the Bible? What does the Bible have to say about this topic of perfectionism?
(I would love to hear some thoughts and suggestions.)

As I finally confess whole-heartedly my inappropriate motivation and desire of my false self-image, I realize that my change of mind/self-image will not be an easy-nor quick-transition, especially for someone who has defined herself by the former for so many years. Yet, it is so important to me that I understand, seek, and desire a true knowledge and confidence about my identity, regardless of career, achievements, or recognition.

Memories

2009-01-13T22:16:00.009-05:00

I really should be in bed right now.

I have plans to wake up around 6am so that I can run 5 miles before my 9am class. (It's all part of a training for the 10 mile Broad Street Run on May 3rd.) For some reason or another, while updating my profile picture on Facebook, I got stuck looking through some old photographs that I've taken throughout my time here at Albright. Don't you love/hate when that (randomly) happens?

Take a look at a few of the memories that I've captured and will always hold dear to my heart. (In chronological order, of course!)

Freshman Year: Dorm room shopping the summer before my first year at Albright! I was so young and naive then! Oh, what a precious picture!

Freshman Year: Ah, yes, an experience that has challenged and strengthened me in several ways: pledging, Greek life, and understanding how it all works.

Freshman year: Meeting my best friend, Nadine Varty, at Albright! MTV came for a "campus invasion" that year!

Sophomore Year: Eagles games+best friends. What more could a girl want?

Sophomore Year: Of course, no student can go to Albright without receiving PANKRATZ PHOTOS! This picture with some of my girlfriends has made the "Albright slide-show" quite a few times!

Sophomore Year: My first "InterVarsity" Christian Fellowship Conference. Who knew that I'd be applying to consider a staff internship a few years later?

Junior Year: A birthday bash thrown for one of my apartment mates, Teira, on her 19th birthday! If you guessed that we're at Applebee's, you're GOOD!

Junior Year: A favorite photo of Erica Rubin (2008 grad) and myself at an Open House-Preview Day.

Junior Year/Senior Year: The "POPS" (Peer Orientation People) 2008 Steering Committee. We bonded since the minute we were placed on a team. Yes, we ALWAYS wore matching T-shirts, too!

Senior Year: I'll never forget the moment of being honored as 2008 Homecoming Queen with Jared Epler, the Homecoming King!

Oh boy, if only I could explain the memories, stories, and lessons learned behind each of these (and hundreds more) photographs. I'm so grateful that I have kept separate scrapbooks for each year that I've attended college so that I can always remember these days. They'll be a resource that I'll be relying upon often as I continue my journey of self-discovery and love.

Sabbath

2009-01-10T17:05:00.007-05:00

Today was a very different sort of day for me.

I had absolutely NO plans.

None.

Zero.

Zip.

And so, as I woke up around 11am, tidied some things up in my living room and kitchen, and moped around with no set plans, I realized something very significant about my life.

I have a really hard time "doing" sabbath.

I woke up today discouraged because of how late I had slept in. When not having a set "agenda" for the day, I found myself searching for things to do. I thought to myself, "maybe I can work on this job application or send out these references." I questioned, "what sort of things can I do now to prepare myself for a few months from now?" I just wasn't content with doing "nothing." I found myself saying, "if I don't find something to do, I'll have WASTED my day!"

I wonder what God thinks when he sees me wrestling with celebrating a sabbath day. As part of one of the creation stories, God creates and celebrates a sabbath day himself:

"By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done" (Genesis 2:2-3).

If a sabbath day is "good enough" for God, it SURE AS WELL should be "good enough" for me! The Bible shares that God blessed the day, making it holy. Celebrating sabbath (rest) is not only important, it's a biblical command:

"Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy" (Exodus 20:8).

I've always struggled with celebrating sabbath regularly. As I've shared in previous blogs, throughout the school year, I thrive off of my "scheduled" lifestyle. I find pleasure in heading to the gym before most of my peers pull themselves out of bed, counting the number of "things" I accomplished that day, and setting goals for the completion of tasks throughout the remaining days of the week. Although I realize it's not the healthiest lifestyle in the least bit, I find myself "doing" and "going."

"Doing" and "going?" Didn't I just write about not wanting to define my lifestyle by those things?

Today, I felt challenged by the phrases I'm remembering from my last post: " It's so easy as leaders to go, go, go and do, do, do. But God is calling us to be, be, be."

Today was definitely a day "to be."

Once I accepted that today was a blessing from God, I took some time to sit in front of my large sliding glass window watching the snow fall as I journaled, prayed, and read some scripture. I'm not sure how long I sat there. It might not have even been that long, but time didn't make a difference. I remember some time later one of my roommates, Teira returning from her trip home, and us both sitting in front of the window together. For the first time in a long time, "T" and I had conversation about "everything and anything." We talked about class assignments, family, games, and most often, God, church, and some spiritual questions. I've missed my time with T; it's one of the reasons why I was thankful we would be taking an interim together. I really valued our time together today. It helped remind me of how blessed l I am to have her as a friend.

For one of the first times while at school, I truly felt as if I were celebrating the sabbath. My thoughts were not distracted with scheduled activities and I felt no burden to quickly return to my homework. Time for myself, time with God, time with a best friend; I need to remember that the sabbath truly is a day to be celebrated!

As my devo dared this morning, I hope that I can continue to challenge myself to "carve out a rhythm (including a sabbath time) that renews me." I want to one day be able to celebrate my "no plans-Saturday." I no longer want my evaluation of a "good day" to be measured by the amount of tasks I've accomplished. I want my days to be holy.

Gifted for Leadership

2009-01-06T08:05:00.003-05:00

I've recently added a new section to my blog. The name is sort of cheesy, but it's a list of women bloggers who I admire for their leadership in ministry-and being able to blog about it! The blog list is called "Girl Power Blogs." Check out some of the blogs if you're a woman reading this who feels that she's called into leadership and/or ministry of some kind.

One of my favorite blogs to check into is a blog for women who are Gifted for Leadership, hence the name of the blog. The blog is currently focusing on a 14-Day Devotional Journal for women, if you're interested in checking it out for yourself, you can download the devotional for FREE by clicking here and follow the prompts!

Today's "devo" was called the "Antidote to Over achievement." I immediately was hooked. Here's a short passage that spoke to me from the devotional:

It's so easy as leaders to go, go, go and do, do, do. But God is calling us to be, be, be. To-do lists, bullet points, and check marks have their place, but when it comes to your spiritual life, you need to toss an“achievement” mindset into the garbage and spend some time in God’s presence simply being the real you.

I then read this post on the leadership blog, and I couldn't believe the similarities between its author and myself:

Did you feel like Sally had you in mind when she wrote today’s devotion? I sure did. As soon as I read her introduction to today’s devotion, I felt like this could be a prophetic nudge from the Lord about an all-too-familiar topic. Because, you see, I’ve always been someone who wants to be not only good at things, but distinctively the best. I’m naturally driven and inquisitive, and find peace in lists and accomplishments. My default is please others and follows the rules. This propensity to overachieve easily went in to hyper-drive when it came to school. In fact, the only intentionally disobedient thing I remember doing in elementary school was to sneak into the forbidden teacher’s lounge and steal extra homework from the recycling bins. Later in high school, I took high-level classes and worked hard for straight A’s. When people at church told me God would take care of all my needs, I would sneer, “Oh yeah? God’s going to write this paper for me?”Clearly, I have problems. While my parents praised my grades, they knew that I sometimes let stress rob me of confidence in God and ultimately of my submission to him. One day, I found a note on my bedroom desk. During his morning devotional time, my dad had been praying for me and felt strongly about Titus 3:14, which says: “Our people must learn to do good by meeting the urgent needs of others; then they will not be unproductive.” Dad jotted me a note (below) which simply reads, “Titus 3:14. Live this out and let the grades fall where they may.” I think he knew that my perfectionism was breeding self-centered anxiety instead of concern for other people. He was telling me that true productivity happens when we love others like God loves them. And he was enabling me to be free from a bondage to over achievement. For me, this verse and memory are what Sally refers to as “antidotes to over achievement.” Like her, I think prayer and meditation – taking the time to refocus and let God get a word in – are invaluable solutions to anxiety. When I really open myself to God in prayer, I begin to feel so small compared to him…and it’s wonderful. That insurmountable task doesn’t necessarily solve itself while I pray, but God gives me the ability to see its importance for what it really is: not very. Do you ever feel this way when you pray? (Hollie Baker-Lutz)

Needless to say, I'll be posting Titus 3:14 on my desk. I'm also not ending this devotional nor blog reading any time soon. I'm finally beginning to feel some clarity about understanding who I am, why I feel gifted in leadership, and how, even as a leader-I'm to focus on "being" rather than "going" and "doing."

Interim at Albright

2009-01-05T22:20:00.004-05:00

When I was driving my familiar route back "home" to Albright last night after a satisfying Eagles win, I couldn't believe that I was returning to school from...well, what has been my very last break. "Already?" I pondered. Oh, why does it always seem like our college breaks last "forever" until we find ourselves shoving clothes into bags the day before we're to return, wondering how the time passed so quickly?

The truth is, I'm actually returning to college three weeks early.

The reason I've returned so early is because I've chosen to take my last course of my college requirements during what Albright refers to as an "interim" period; essentially, a three-week January session. The spring semester doesn't begin until January 26th, so, until then, a few hundred students have chosen to return to Albright's campus to practice for a sport's team, work an on-campus job, or sneak in an extra class (class are held for 3 consecutive hours each day).

I absolutely love "interim" at Albright.

When I was a freshman, I didn't return during Albright's interim time; thinking that instead, I'd want to celebrate the extended break with my family. I remember working, scrap-booking, hanging out with friends, and then, being very, very bored. Understanding that I'm a person who loves to "always be doing something," I vouched to never have that long of a break again! Every year since then, I've made sure to sign up for an interim course.

The beauty of interim at Albright is that it's a comfortable "in-between" transition from break to the spring semester. With only taking one course either in the morning or evening, students are free to collect green, catch up with friends, or have time to themselves to enjoy personal activities like reading, watching movies, or sleeping! For me, the start of interim was refreshing as I thrived off of jumping back into my "usual routine." I was excited to be running my usual three miles at 7am this morning, jumping in the shower by 8:10am, and walking into the campus center by 8:45am to grab a bagel before my 9am class. Having a chance to eat lunch with friends by 12:30pm, my afternoon quickly filled with a meeting at the career center at 1pm, research in the library at 2pm, shopping at Walmart until 4pm, some organizing, homework, dinner, a quick nap all before hanging with friends at 7:30pm. I even had a chance to "relax" with my roommate as she watched TV and I read New Moon, the second book of the Twilight saga.

Early mornings, busy afternoons, schedules, I just love it. (Not all the time. There are times to relax "schedule-less" of course!)

I'm excited about my 2009 interim course, Educational Theatre. Taught by a team of two professors (one in the education field and one in the theatre field), the class is designed for future professionals that are going to working closely with people, in a business, counseling, teaching, or other relationship. The course aims to assist future professionals in being able to use theatre techniques as tools for such human relations professions. With 13 days, we're expected to produce a 20 minute play in ensembles of 5 as well as present an "personal theatre project" to illustrate our individual growth within the course.

Outside of class, I'll be working 16 hours each week between three different jobs in the fitness center, admission office, and at Hope's Hangout, an after-school program in Reading. I hope to spend time reconnecting with friends a few nights each week and using the weekends to invite friends from home to share in some of my Albright experience-most have never ever seen my apartment! I've even set some (more) goals for myself regarding my improvement in what I call "domesticating myself." Because I only have a meal plans to eat 7 meals in the campus dining hall, I'll be challenging myself to cook dinner a few nights each week. And when I write myself, I truly mean myself seeing that the "usual" cook of our household, my roommate Sarah, will not return until the 26th! I hoping that with the extra time, I'll be able to exercise the patience to prepare and cook my own meals, especially as I adjust my eating schedule for student teaching!

Interim will be a time of growth, self-reflection, and (of course) good ole' Albright fun! It's my last opportunity at school to have the freedom to stay up late, hang with friends, and celebrate the flexibility of my college schedule-especially on the weekdays!

Oh, how I'm going to miss college-well, Albright College!

New Year's Resolution

2009-01-03T10:33:00.005-05:00

2009: I can't believe it.

This is going to be a huge year! Full of graduations, weddings, celebrations, and major times of transitions, 2009 is going to be a year that sticks in my mind forever.

As always, it's a tradition to make a resolution (or a few) for the new year. This is easy for me to do. Too often than not my mind is preoccupied with thinking about the future. Some of the New Year's resolutions that I've set for myself include the following:

1. I want to read the entire Bible in one year. I know, I know, this sound super ambitious, super nerdy, and maybe super boring to lots of people. I think I made this resolution last year too. Obviously, it didn't exactly turn out as I'd wished. This year, I've looked into a few additional resources that can help me. I've chosen to follow an Old/New Testament reading plan, in which I'll be able to read a bit from the Old and New Testament each day. Other selections offer Bible reading plans to read the bible in chronological, historical, or from beginning to end. Check it out at Bible Gateway.com and www.ewordtoday.com/year/.

2. I want to continue to love myself and my body through emotional, spiritual, and physical care. Up until a few years ago, I never realized how difficult it was for me to love myself and my body. I never thought I was one of those young girls whose mind was filled with junk about false beauty, security and self-image until I faced some of those issues head on in college. I'm now excited to share that I've been pursuing a transition in which I'm truly beginning to celebrate my body. I'm recognizing God's creativity through it's uniqueness-curvy, short, and strong. Likewise, I've been trying to celebrate my strengths, gifts, and passions and focus on these areas in which God has specifically made me. I look forward to continuing to find freedom in eating healthy and exercising because of the right reasons, such as wanting to keep the body that God's designed me with strong. Just as equally, I hope to continue to understand that a love for myself is not based upon achievements and accomplishments, but on loving who I am on the inside, my character, my values, regardless of all that "stuff," especially when no-one's watching.

3. Finally, I want to continue to seek out opportunities to discover my passions. (Or, to perhaps narrow the focus on my passions!) With being interested in so many different things-teaching, ministry, speaking, etc. etc. etc.), I NEED to continue to seek out all different types of opportunities and record my thoughts along the way! Thus, in the New ear, I intend to network with speakers nation-wide, seek out speaking/presentation engagements, and blog about all of my experiences. Beginning with my student teaching experience come February, I hope to include my thoughts, struggles, and frustrations about teaching so that my responses are effectively considered!

It looks like I have a bit of things to hold myself accountable for. I hope that by publicly sharing some of these resolutions, I stick with them and keep you updated on my adventures!

Good luck on your resolutions!

I LOVE the Wii Fit!

2008-12-30T22:07:00.007-05:00

Okay, so I must admit, I have a new addiction.

Even worse, it's an addiction to a video game.

But not just any video game; one of the hottest video games on the market, the Nintendo Wii Fit.

This game is incredible! It offers games and activities in aerobics, strength training, balance games, and yoga for multiple players. The game can track your BMI and weight, calculate a "Wii Age" that fits a body test, and offer you fitness tips. You can even set and track weight loss/gain goals with the program!
Although I haven't quite explored the yoga exercises, I can't help but try to break records in the other areas. I currently hold a record for the tightrope and ski-jump balance games. In the strength training exercises, I've challenged my "trainer" to push-ups or jack knife exercises. My favorite games are the aerobic exercises. In fact, I'm excited to share that I proudly hold the hoola-hoop record of over 3,300 hoola hoops on the ten minute challenge!

Okay, okay, enough boasting, I understand!

You can just bet, though, that I'll be playing this game as much as possible while I'm here! It's a great game to play individually and especially with family! This is definitely a game that I'll be looking out for when I can afford a Wii of my own!

Explore the site and take a look for yourself!

Christmas Time

2008-12-29T11:46:00.005-05:00

With Christmas passed, the weekend over, and New Year's right around the corner, I've reluctantly accepted that my relaxing time with family, games, and lots of food is coming to a close. This Christmas has been one of the best that I can remember. Whether surprising both sets of parents with family photos, playing hours of the Wii with my brothers, or spending time surrounded by extended family and friends, I realize how very blessed I am.

One of my favorite memories this holiday came as a request that my mom had for one of her Christmas presents. Her desire was for us, as a family, to serve others somewhere on Christmas Eve. And so, Christmas Eve began with some exciting adventures as my mom, brother John, and I set off in the late morning to volunteer our time at Boyertown Salvation Army serving community members at the Christmas Eve dinner.

It was easy to sign up to serve. We simply contacted Boyertown Salvation Army, asked about opportunities, and were marked on a list to serve from 11am-2pm. The meal began at noon, in which many members from the congregation, elders, and friends gathered for a free dining experience. A youth lounge area was decorated with dozens of tables set for eight, placed with candy-cane goodies and holiday decor.

All the guests enjoyed themselves. And for us, the experience was unforgettable.

Although we felt a bit out of place at first because we had no idea what our roles were nor the people with whom we were serving, my family and I quickly hit it off connecting with others. I was pleased to chat with several people; one young woman who recently has graduated from college and now teaches in the elementary division, two people whom graduated from Eastern, a youth minister, one individual going to seminary, a student at PV West in the 7th grade (my brother Thomas's school and grade), and even a twenty-one year old girl from Malawi, Africa. I collected cards, names, exchanged stories, and even was extended a job opportunity!

In addition to connecting with the volunteers and staff members, I loved conversing with the community members who came to enjoy the meal. As I was "assigned" to offer drinks to people at their table, it came easy for me to begin conversation about simple things; sports, school, Christmas plans, etc.! Some of my favorite points of conversation were with some older gentleman about football, movie collections, and old television shows. One teenager girl explained to me her Christmas t-shirt of "I want a cute boy for Christmas." One older gentlemen even asked me where the wine was, since Jesus drank wine at his dinners!

People are incredible, aren't they?

It's so silly how I sometimes-often- so easily pass over the individuality and uniqueness each single person has to offer.

Come 2pm, my family and I were sad to say goodbye to our new found friends. We shouted that we hope to see everyone at the same time and place next year. I collected Mwai's full name so that we could become official facebook friends and keep in touch. Even my brother John (who usually lacks expression for most family outings) talked about interesting parts of his experience on the ride home.

I think our family's found a new Christmas tradition.
(At least I hope!)

It's so amazing how contributing even just a few hours around the holidays towards serving others can help remind you of Jesus's most important two commandments: to love God and to love others.

29"The most important one," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. 30Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. 31The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'There is no commandment greater than these." (Mark 12: 29-31)

Sometimes, it's so easy to get caught up in doing things for ourselves around the holidays, even if that just means "relaxing with family, games, and lots of food." Of course, so much importance lies in spending time with family. Yet, why not try some ways to spend time with family, whether immediate or extended, by serving others together? Find a way to make a tradition for loving others; whether it be around Christmas or year-round. You may be surprised at how close it draws your family together.

I've included a few sites below that are excellent sources for serving opportunities. Take a look!

Central PA Food Bank: http://www.centralpafoodbank.org/
The Salvation Army: http://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usn/www_usn_2.nsf
Habitat for Humanity: http://www.habitat.org/

Eternal Life

2008-12-23T23:59:00.008-05:00

Something serious has happened in my family today.

My father is one of seven. He has three sisters and three brothers. When he was young, his youngest brother died as a teenager. Just two years ago, his older brother died from liver failure. Today, my father spent the evening with his only remaining living brother.

Today, my father told me that his only living brother has three months to live.

My uncle, my dad's last living brother, is dying from cancer.

Dying.

Seeing that it's almost Christmas Eve, I realize how the holidays are always a time to embrace family and close friends. I'm constantly reminded of how joyful my friends seem when their facebook status reads "home with the family" or "there's no place like home" at this time of year.

Family, family, family.

I myself wasn't always one who viewed family as a priority, until my dad began to hassle me about it when I was a teenager. I frequently remember him telling me, "love your brothers, because they'll be some of the closest friends you'll have."

Now, only 22, now, as I begin to "jump into the real world," now, as I watch my family mourn over broken relationships, death, and regret, I cannot be more thankful for my father's instruction.

Family is so important.

Friends are so important.

People are so important.

And yet, relationships are risky.

Yet, why does death have to hurt so bad?

Why is it so difficult to watch the tears in my father's tears eyes and not wonder why this pain has to exist?

At what point did God see it as essential to end the lives of what He's created?

To think, that one pours so much time into loving someone else; spending time with them, helping them, listening to them, creating memories together, to one day have to either leave them emotionally, physically, or in both ways.

But, Jesus is all about relationships.

Isn't it interesting how Jesus calls us "follow him" into one of the most risky investments that we can make? Jesus calls us to love others, full well knowing the pain that it can cause when we're separated from those relationships.

I wonder if Jesus ever had to watch 3 of his brothers die.

I wonder how Jesus felt while looking into the eyes of those that battled death.

I wonder how Jesus used the sorrow and compassion that he felt for others for something better.

And then there's this offer of eternal life.

Jesus says, "I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life"
(John 5:24).

Eternal life.

Family.

Dying from cancer.

My dad is spiritual giant and someone I deeply admire because of his relationship with God. He's often challenging my family, particularly my brothers and I, to treat each other well. He often hopes for opportunities to hug each of us, no matter how embarrassing it may seem. He always speaks to us with guidance, wisdom, and love. So, today, naturally, when my father shared his news, every ounce of my insides were bursting to cry with him and hold his hand and tell him, "everything will be okay! I love you, dad! Trust the Lord!"

Yet, I couldn't.

It was too uncomfortable.

Instead, I choose to sit and listen to every word or thought or story that my dad wanted to share. I offered to do the dishes with him. I chose to spend as much time as possible around him.

Good, I thought. But not great. Why didn't I cry with him or hold his hand?

I don't want to ever loose my family members and friends and then regret that I didn't spend enough time with them or that I didn't know them well enough. I especially don't ever want to regret sharing the news of receiving eternal life with them. This past week in church, a video of Penn from magicians Penn and Tailor was shared. Penn, an atheist spoke on the topic of sharing one's faith, posing "how much do you have to hate someone to not proselytize?" (Note: proselytize means to introduce someone to one's one religious faith. It had me guessing for awhile!)

I like to think that I don't hate anyone.

But sometimes-lots of times-proselytizing, like embracing family members, is uncomfortable, even with those that are closest to you. Listening and spending time with people will always be ways to show them love. I hope, though, that I can somehow be brave enough to risk the discomfort of embracing them and telling them, "I love you! I love you!" so that I can show my family and closest friends the most absolute love possible while spending time with them one earth.

And then, if my family and friends whom I love are not believers, perhaps my love for them will open doors for them to consider Jesus's invitation to everlasting life.

Perhaps then, one day, my friends, family, and I will all be able to embrace everlasting life, just as Jesus promises.

[This is an annual Christmas Tree Cutting picture from 2006 with both my dad and my uncle. Please ignore the stubborn child in the front left. He did not approve of the Christmas tree.]

USA TODAY FIRST TEAM ALL ACADEMIC AWARD

2008-12-22T00:50:00.006-05:00

I recently was nominated for a "USA Today First-Team All Academic Award." It's an award that recognizes the top 20 undergraduate students in the United States for the academic, intellectual, and societal achievements that they've accomplished. I was encouraged by many professors and administrators on my campus to represent Albright (and myself, of course) for the award by submitting an application. Come February, the winners will receive their pictures and biographies in the USA paper and a $2500.00 cash award.

Naturally, the application process for such an award was rigorous; asking for multiple explanations of academic, leadership, and professional experiences. Recommendations were needed from multiple venues. Most important (and most challenging), each student was expected to write a 500 word essay on his or her "most intellectual endeavor" throughout their undergraduate experience. The endeavor was judged on difficulty, uniqueness, and whether it benefits society.

Throughout my essay and as I describe my most intellectual endeavor, I wrote of the importance of discovering a passion to love and serve people. In one paragraph, I specifically state: "I aspire to one day continue communicating my desire for all people: whether women or men, young or old, that their value lies not in artificial assessments, such as academic achievement or popularity, but in understanding and loving themselves and others."

I've discovered a passion.

A passion in which I aspire to communicate to people that their lives are not based upon artificial assessment, such as academic achievement or popularity, but in understanding and loving themselves and others.

What a wonderful aspiration.

Yet, ironically (or probably not so much), after completing my application and finishing the semester, my challenge for others and "mission" for myself as stated above was tested as I anxiously checked my fall semester grades online.

After receiving my very first A- last semester, dropping my perfect 4.0 GPA to a "not uniform" 3.987, I convinced myself that my grades were no longer to identify me. Rather than measuring my self-worth on a 4.0 scale, I was to instead adopt a mission loving and serving people; finding my value in a love for people rather than an artificially assessed number.

Stubbornly, I still anticipated nothing short of a 4.0 for the semester.

Can't I believe all that "mush" about myself and still get nearly perfect grades?

Apparently not.

What I saw instead was another "not uniform" GPA, this time, a 3.976. I had received another A-, this time in my psychology senior seminar.

Apparently I wasn't the only stubborn one.

And so, when discovering my less-than-perfect-even lower than before GPA a second time, I cried.

Balwed, actually.

All day long.

In fact, I cried so much that I began to feel completely incapable of anything. I concluded that because I had received a 3.97 GPA I had "failed." That because I now hold a 3.97 GPA, I will not academically "stand out" on job applications. That because I've dropped to a 3.97 GPA, I was stupid, ugly, and friendless; anything but valuable.

Ouch.

It wasn't until I had an experience with my brother and a conversation with my boyfriend did some sense knock into me.

I thought that after my first A-, I had accepted myself with my imperfection of a 3.987 GPA. However, what I realized upon receiving my second A- was that I had not completely accepted that reality. I still had a "conditional sense of value" for myself; a value dependent upon my achievementd with grades.

Yet, after tutoring my twelve year old brother with his math homework, I felt refreshed of why I so boldly stated that loving and serving others helps me feel most alive. And after listening to Adam, I was reminded that in a world that is filled with poverty, hunger, divorce, rape, war, disease, and inequalities, we serve a God that cares about people, not about GPAs.

You see, because if you really choose to make your life about others, like Jesus, becoming obsessed over little things like GPAs don't exactly fit the "loving and serving others" description. Of course, working hard, performing well, and learning through academics is important and it can help others. Yet, there is a line that can be danced around by certain over-achievers in which the choice to "achieve As" becomes an unhealthy obsession of artificially loving and serving no one but one's self; falsely stating "I'm important because I earned an A, and I better keep it up, or else..."

I'm not sure what sort of grades or GPA Jesus received when in school.

I'm not sure if today he would make the All-USA Today Academic Firs Team with his picture in the newspaper and a cash prize award.

I am certain though that we don't know his grades for a reason.

That's not what defined him, and that's not why he's remembered.

Jesus was transformational because of his love for others and service for people.

Heck, if he won the award, he'd just end up giving the cash prize away anyway.

Christmas Eve Services

2008-12-21T22:22:00.006-05:00

Looking for a church where you and your family can celebrate Christmas? Check out the Christmas Eve services that are being offered at Christ's Church of the Valley in Royersford, PA!

John 666: Don't Leave

2008-12-18T01:01:00.003-05:00

That's the official name of this year's Pennsylvania Christian Teen Convention (PCTC) theme:

John 666: Don't Leave. The description given on the official PCTC website (mypctc.com) includes the following:

John 6:66-69 "From that time many of His disciples went back and walked with Him no more. 67 Then Jesus said to the twelve, "Do you also want to go away?" 68 But Simon Peter answered Him, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. 69 "Also we have come to believe and know that You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."
John 6:66 represents the saddest verse in the Bible. Many who came to know Jesus decided that what He asked of them was to much to handle and the deserted Him, never to walk with Him again. The question Jesus has for us is the same one Jesus asked the 12 after the others left Him - will you also Go away?

PCTC has been a conference that the youth ministry at my church, Christ Church of the Valley, has been attending for years. Teenagers and youth leaders alike look forward to the wisdom and insight that is offered through speakers, worship, workshops, and bonding time. I attended my first conference as a student in my senior year of high school (2005) and have returned each year since as a youth leader for middle school girls.

I'm inspired and encouraged each year by the sermons, workshops, and themes that are addressed at PCTC. Oddly enough, every year without fail, I recall my heart burning with passion when listening to an inspirational man or woman talk to students about their journeys with Jesus. I often react by touching my chest and thinking, "Here comes that feeling again. I know I could do this one day."

Two years ago, after hearing a young woman deliver a phenomenal presentation to teenage girls about body image, I was hopeful that I, too, could perhaps speak at PCTC. I remember leaving the conference last year professing to my middle school girlfriends, "I'm doing it. I'm leading a workshop next year." Regardless of when or how it could happen, I knew it would be an incredible experience and opportunity to set a foot in the door for speaking engagements.

Just a few days ago, I contacted my old youth pastor, Matt Silver, who serves on the leadership board of PCTC. Remembering a conversation that we had a few years prior, I serenly asked him (via facebook, of course) if there was any chance that I could possibly lead a workshop; no expectations, of course. To my surprise, he immediately answered the message with contact information for someone further involved in the selection process; Greg Smedley! Greg told me he has "one last spot to fill" and informed me that if I fill out a leader questionnaire with some information about the workshop I'm hoping to lead, I should be good!

I couldn't believe it! What an opportunity! And to think, what if I didn't ask?

Needless to say, I'm busy praying and thinking over topics that are of student interest. I've got a few ideas in mind, some specifically for girls and one just for sponsors. I've thought about issues concerning sharing one's faith, gossip, identity, relationships, and building relationships with teenagers. I'll be hard at work next youth group time collecting answers from students. If any of you readers have ideas, I'd love for you to share them!

When thinking of this PCTC experience, I'm reminded of the verse in Ephesians 5:15-17 that reads, "Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. "

I definitely want to make sure that I'm making the most of every opportunity as I'm searching for God's will for my life. I belive that one way of being wise is learning that it never hurts to ask about opportunities; after all, I'd rather risk asking "a silly question" than miss an opportunity that could lead to greater things. I think many would be surprised at just how many opportunities are waiting for people passionate enough to reach out.

I can't wait to explore what else is out there!

The F Word.

2008-12-17T00:01:00.005-05:00

I used to be inspired by the word future.

So much lies within the future.
There are so many possibilities!
Dreams can be accomplished!
Anything is possible!

Now, a senior at Albright, I loathe hearing, thinking, or speaking the word. It's all everyone talks about. "Oh, you're a senior, what are you doing next year?" "Oh, ready for the real world?" "What are you future plans?"

In fact, Adam's restricted my use of the F word around him. I think he finds it appauling.

In a desperate frenzy to try and fill in the blank that lies at the end of my life equation come May 24th, 2009, I've found myself CONSTANTLY thinking about the future. [Will I be a teacher? Will I be in ministry? Where will I live? How often will I move? Will I change my job? How often? Will I ever travel? Where? When? How?] You see, for so long (so long being 16 years of my educational career thus far), I've been able to solve my "what's next equation" with a new semester schedule, a listing of classes, or a new club that I'm hoping to join. My "what's next" question has always been answered, as long as I was returning to school. Now, approaching graduation and not sure of what to study in graduate school, I'm faced to make a decision farthest from my most adored "career" yet; student life.

Thinking about the possibility of work, living arrangements, and marriage, I'm overwhelmed with postulating ideas of how to pursue my passions and interests while upholding the value of my family, friendships, and relationship. Not positive that I can promise a commitment greater than a year's time, I'm searching for experience in any of my areas of interest to help me focus my direction of vocation. In preparation for the months' experiences that lie ahead, I've been constructing several resumes; one geared towards teaching, one geared towards ministry opportunities, one geared towards public speaking venues...it doesn't help that generally, I have a resume with over four pages of experiences, extra-cirriculars, and skills! (Okay, so maybe it does help, it's just a lot of work!)

So far, here are some of the [F-----] options that I'm considering:

Traditional teaching in a school district K-6th grade. I'll be graduating with my elementary education certification after completing my student teaching in January in the Reading School District (5th and 6th graders). I'm eagerly awaiting this experience to contrast it with several of my other interested career aspirations. If I enjoy my inner-city experience, I'll look to apply to similar placements. By teaching in a title once school district (Reading, Philadelphia, Norristown), I can collect sign-on stipens and "loan forgiveness" benefits. Danger: teaching (especially inner-city) calls for a very high burn out rate.
Teach for America, an Americore sponsored program. Again, considering my passion and gift of teaching, I'll be completing my application for Teach for America, a two year program that places corps members in some of the most educationally underprivledged areas across the country. Because of my close ties to Collegeville, PA, I've requested to be placed in the Camden/Philadelphia region. This program requires a two year commitment (risky, I'm aware) with education requirements during the summer. The program provides employees with stipen, living, and transitional benefits. Loan forgiveness and scholarships towards graduate schools/higher education are also available.
An Intervarsity Campus Ministry internship is another highly attractive option. Greatly influenced and involved with my campus ministry through college, I've learned of the significance of students owning their faith when approaching adulthood. Many aspects of becoming an Intervarsity staff member attract me; its flexibility, room for creativity, opportunity for speaking engagements and conference planning, and close relations with college life. I could be placed at a variety of campuses in Eastern Pennsylvannia, including my current instition. Unfortunately, the internship is unpaid, meaning that I'd need to find an additional job to help support my living needs. Fortunately, I look forward to the possibility of getting a job related to working at a college (my next bullet). The internship is one year long, an encouraging feature; and if nothing else, it will be a great opportunity to continue challenging my faith.
A College Admissions Counselor has been a job that I've been interested to explore since my discovered passion to inspire students to attend Albright as an student ambassador. Knowing my excitement to offer hope, excitement, and opportunities to prospective students, I'm confident that my skills and experience as a tour guide, blogger, overnight host, and conference speaker for Albright overqualifies me for any admissions counselor position at any institution. Albright, of course, is an institution that I'm considering applying to (much depends on if I pursue the Intervarsity internship), yet other institutions offer tuition remission and tuition exchange programs where, if you work at the institution, you can take graduate classes for FREE! Thus, I'm considering employment at other institutions, like Eastern University, which offer possible graduate programs of my interest (not that I can choose just one, yet!). I'll be meeting with a current admissions counselor come January to work through these opportunities.
Finally, I'd love any job where I can exercise my LOVE OF PUBLIC SPEAKING. Out of all my dreams and passions, I know that speaking to crowds is something I absolutely adore and want to be part of my f-----. Whether speaking about Albright College or speaking Truth to children, teenagers, or young adults, I cannnot ignore my fascination or talent with such a gift. I've contacted one organization, Campus Outreach Services, to gain additional information about possibilities with their programs (thanks, April!), and have entertained my thoughts about a few additional options. Regardless of profession, I'll always be looking for opportunities to speak at events. I'll be pursuing Toastmasters International, a public speaking and leadership organization, for further opportunities as well.

And yet, to think, this is only the beginning! Who knows, one of these options may not even be the one that I'll fall into come May. And so, I've been challenging myself to not occupy my mind too frequently with thoughts and plans of the future. Known as one to "plan and organize" (gotta love those ESFJs), it's very difficult for me to not try and "plan every option" while knowing I'm only a few months away from a completely different lifestyle. I've realized that with so many passions and gifts, I'm driven towards many different professions and opportunities, and I have a lifetime to experience them. This year has been all about trust God with the end of equation, while learning to not get so wrapped up in the future that I can't enjoy the joy of the present. A few verses remind me of how to direct my thoughts about the future:

Proverbs 16:3
Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.
Proverbs 16:9
In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.
Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.

It does not take much for me to suspect that I'll be revisiting this topic soon. I promise to keep you posted on the above propositions. And of course, if any of you have advice or futher organizations, placements, opportunities to consider post graduation, I'd love to hear about them! I'm exciting for these next steps, as nerve-wracking as they can sometimes seem. But for now, remind me to focus on the PRESENT while being mindful about the F word.

Blogging is HARD.

2008-12-16T23:19:00.004-05:00

I've realized that I'm not very great at this skill of "blogging." Seeing that I haven't blogged since, oh, October, I've taken note to how inconvenient it feels to blog. It's always easier to write my thoughts in a journal where I don't have to worry about spell check or if the message that I'm presenting through my writing is offensive. Often, I find that when I sit to write a blog, I'm spending minutes more than I imagined reviewing and revising my work.

Is that how blogging is supposed to feel?

I've regretted not blogging for awhile. I've often thought about throwing up a new story or an idea, but have been too embarrassed by the wide gap that separates my previous "blogging frenzy" with another wasted web page on the web. Oh well-I admit-I'm giving in. Now on Christmas break, I believe that I've found time to write about my thoughts and I'm anxious to do so, so here I am, once again.

I've thought about changing my blog to write about seasonal topics, for example, my experience that will soon be approaching with student teaching. Yet, I'm afraid that even with such an ambition, I'll once again resort to negligence. I'm searching for ways to discipline myself to write, but I can't help but notice that when I'm limited with my time because of my commitment to my studies and activities at school, I'm over too overwhelmed, exhausted, and preoccupied to dedicate time to establishing a "web-friendly MJ."

And then, of course, I can't help but to admit the benefits that come from blogging: the feeling of accomplishment when sharing sincere thoughts with an audience or the reality of self-reflection that emulates when recording thoughts, feelings, or confessions, to name a few. Not to mention, one can gain a great vocabulary and strength in writing skills, style, and voice from blogging. I say that it's easier to journal, yet sometimes, I find myself neglecting that as well! Thoughts are too precious to be forgotton or sometimes, too inventious to not be shared.

So, for all you experienced bloggers out there, I'd love to hear your thoughts. How does blogging become a priority of yours? It is scheduled? Expected? Do you blog in the morning or at night? Randomly? Perhaps I'll work to exercise some of your suggestions. This blogging exercise is a personal challenge for my self growth, and so, I look forward to sharing that growth with others. I admire bloggers like my boyfriend, Adam Flora, and am inspired by his commitment to consistency. Perhaps one day, I'll master the efforts of blogging. Until then, I apologize for any frustrations with the inconsistent blogging spurts and topics!

Looking forward to attracting an audience once again!

Chick-Fil-A + 2 Amazing Girls = Medicine for an Blissful Afternoon

2008-10-14T14:24:00.003-04:00

Today I had the pleasure of meeting up to lunch with two of the most inspirational young women I know. It's incredible what a small lunch date can do to change your day.

These women are powerful in their walk with Christ. Their both on a mission to fulfill God's will within their lives. While April raved about her internship at CCV, her success with her recent goals that she set for herself, and interest in living on-campus at Eastern, Mandy talked about her excitement for her campus ministry, small group, and her options upon graduation.

It was such a relief to chat with two girls who understood how it felt to not be sure of what the future holds for us or to not be sure what exactly God's voice tells us when we're trying to make decisions.

Together we spent just short of two hours laughing with each other about our silliness, empathizing with one another over our challenges, and encouraging each other within our journeys through life.

I'm so blessed to have these two girls within my life. Whether we see teaching, ministry, or non-profits in our future, I know that together we'll be shining.

MEET C4: Sarah Wolf

2008-10-01T14:35:00.007-04:00

She's spunky.

She's not afraid to speak her mind.

She's soooo one of my best friends.

Meet Sarah Wolf.

I met Sarah last year when she was a freshmen at Albright. While meeting her at one of the first Albright Christian Fellowships meetings, we immediately clicked, and I made it a personal mission to "take Sarah under my wing"-Junior to Freshmen. As Sarah and I began to hang out more and more, she began to teach me so much more about myself than I believed I was teaching her as a junior. I thought, "this can't be right? I'M THE JUNIOR!"

Ironically, (or not so ironically) Sarah is now one of my four apartment mates. Sarah and I now joke that her major contribution to my learning involve her "domestic skills" and her ability to "teach me to be domestic" before it's too late! Believe me, I appreciate her skills and talents IMMENSLY. (You should taste her cooking!)

Beyond food, however, Sarah has taught me many more valuable truths that I'm not sure I would be able to realize if I never had met her. In fact, some of the things that I love best about Sarah is her outspoken personality. Unlike myself, Sarah is NEVER afraid to speak her mind-and I LOVE HER for it! Sarah's ability to stick to a decision or a passion point motivates me and her bold personality has taught me how to aim to do the same for myself. Beyond her speaking talents, however, Sarah has the soft heart of a loving, compassionate, and generous individual. Her care and concern for others is inspirational and encouraging to those around her.

Sarah's that sort of friend who I can do anything and everything with. Whether it be cooking together and telling each other about our days, going on Walmart trips at midnight, crying to each other in our living room, or taking naps and sleeping through meetings, I've got a true friend in Sarah. She's someone who I'm not afraid to tease when we're "fighting, " laugh with about our stupidity, or push-over when I'm sitting on the couch (believe me, she does WORSE things to me)!

One of the aspects of my and Sarah's friendship that I admire most is our similarity in relationships. Like myself, Sarah is involved in a long-distance relationship with a boy that she is very much in love with. Sarah and I frequently find ourselves talking about our relationships; laughing about the boys, funny things we've done, mistakes we've made, fights we've had, ways we've acted..we can go on forever. I've never before had a girlfriend that I could talk to about my relationship with Adam. As I've watched Sarah grow in her relationship with John, I've been able to learn and recognize things about my own relationship that I want to better improve; how I treat Adam for example, or how I can try and understand things from his perspective. I love hearing Sarah share conversations about her and John's book discussions. Knowing that her and John like to read through books together encourages me of their desire as a couple to learn more about God together.

Sarah is constantly growing. I frequently see her mozying around the apartment with her "metal sheathed" Bible and C.S. Lewis books. When discussing pieces of scripture or biblical topics, she frequently shares a viewpoint very different than my own. I'm so grateful to have Sarah in my life and even more, to call her one of my sisters in Christ.

She's an out-of-this world, no-one get in her way, nonconformist sort of girl. She's incredible.

She will be in my wedding-I mean, planning my wedding one day.

Sarah Wolf, you're the sister I never had.

I love you. :)

MEET C4: Nadine Varty

2008-09-17T15:30:00.002-04:00

She’s one of the primary reasons why I stayed at Albright, even after being unsure of my acceptance months into freshmen year. After meeting her through a women’s bible study group, she’s gone from an accepting friend with open arms to my roommate for the past two years.

Meet Nadine Varty.

One of the first and greatest memories that I share with Nadine occurred during a Friday night in Freshmen year. We both decided to attend on of the Domino Players’ productions that night and cap off our experience with the “classic” girly sleepover. After the show, we headed off to Wawa to get some snacks (I specifically remember grabbing some ice-cream) and lost track of time as we chatted into the night’s hours about our families, friends, and college experience. I remember waking up at noon the next morning (and Nadine explaining how that’s fairly common because of the lack of light that shines through the slit in the Walton basement window.) Since then, we’ve been attached at the hip. We’ve done all sorts of things from studying scripture together, praying for each other, supporting each other at events, staying in touch over the summer (and during Nadine’s study aboard to Scotland), and now, spending each day together as roommates!

Nadine Varty is certainly one special young woman. Grounded in her faith, she is one that has inspired my walk with Jesus. Nadine's life has been no "cake-walk," yet her struggles have only helped her grow stronger. Her love and mercy for others has opened my eyes to change my attitudes and treatment of others. Nadine’s stories of hope and joy gravitate me when I’m overwhelmed or overburdened. She is one who is always willing to help, listen, offer advice, and put herself before others. There has never been a time where I couldn’t feel comfortable turning to Nadine for a few comforting moments.

Some additional favorite characteristics that I love about Nadine include her sense of humor, kind-spirit, good intentions, dedication, levels of commitment, understanding of self, and priority of family and friends. Nadine’s joy for life shows her constant stride to learn about her identity in God, always thirsting for more and thoroughly enjoying those special moments of “God time” that she gets to share with her creator.

Nadine Varty, thank you for being such a wonderful best friend. You’ve helped me to understand the importance of friendship and the priority it holds in my life. You’ve been one of the greatest encouragers and a friend who’s always cheered for me. Nadine, it’s been such a joy to watch you grow over the past three and a half years, and looking back on my college experience, I look as our friendship as a fairy-tale. I know that our time together here is the just the start of a friendship that will carry us into Heaven.

Thank you for being all that a best friend can be.

I love you. :)

IMPORTANT POST: HELP!

2008-09-13T19:49:00.003-04:00

It has recently been brought to my attention that there is a family in need of some community help! Jim and Sue Umstead, lifelong Perkiomen residents, are being forced to sell their family's farmhouse on nearly 10 acres to build a community park! Ironically, there are plenty of parks already located near the area; Plank Road Park, the Township Building playground/park, the fire-station's open fields, the basketball courts/fields at Cranberry, and Perkiomen Valley School Districts' fields and parks. Jim and Sue are members of our Christ's Church of the Valley family, and in response to this unfair treatment, we are joining together to challenge the township.

If you are interested in reading more information about this story or how you can help, please redirect yourself to the link below. There's still time to make a difference!

Keep on pressin' on!

http://www.helpoutyourneighbor.com/

MEET C4: Ms. Teira "T" Jeffcoat

2008-09-13T18:58:00.004-04:00

I call her "T."

T for Teira.

She is one of the most gorgeous young women I know. In fact, I frequently tell her that she should be a model! Her beauty, however, is more captivating than any physical feature can offer. Teira Jeffcoat has the inner-beauty of a young woman chasing fast after God's own heart.

I remember meeting Teira two years ago at our campus' Christian Fellowship (ACF). In fact, it was the first meeting in which Teira and I sat down to talk. Since that first get-together, I remember bumping into Teira in the Mohn residence hall when she would be reading her Bible late at night on the third floor. Frequently, her and I would meet on the ground floor to read together, pray together, and chat about each other's lives.

While Teira was still a freshmen, my friend Nadine and I (to be featured in the next post) sought her out as a roommate for "C4." We wanted her to become a part of a friendship that would carry us into our finals years of college-and beyond.

Having T as a roommate has been one of the greatest blessings for my personal growth and walk with Jesus. We frequently find ourselves stumbling into "serious conversations" with each other-conversations about faith, about what we're reading, about our fellowship, our actions, ourselves, boys, courting, self-confidence, etc., etc., etc. We can find ourselves talking for hours. When we're not chatting, T's great company for watching movies, shopping, and "craftying." She's always got the greatest fashion advice (especially when she saves my life by telling me my legs are blue because of blue jean dye), her "jokes" can have you laughing for hours, and her smile is one of true happiness.

T is a one-in-a-million type of friend; someone whom you can only find few and far between, someone who is enthusiastic, caring, and genuine. Some of the characteristics that I admire most about T are her patience, discipline, great listening skills, mercy, enthusiasm, loyalty, and compassion for others. She's intelligent, trust-worthy, and dedicated to her commitments.

What I love most about T, however, is her unique sense of individuality that she carries for herself. Teira Jeffcoat is a woman defining herself by the love God carries for her. She's confident, yet humble; outgoing, yet striving for independence; she's sassy, and yet sensitive. Teira Jeffcoat knows who she is and isn't scared to show herself to the world. Even if she would argue about that compliment with me, she can't argue the fact that she strives each day to better understand herself through scripture, prayer, and a hard, fast sprint towards God's open arms for her.

Teira Jeffcoat, you're an inspiration. I hope that one day my daughter will transform into a beautiful woman just like yourself. You know your priorities and you're committed to what matters most to you. From you I've learned the fruit that comes when understanding one's self through God's perspective, and have strived to pursue such fruit myself. I'll always remember you-not only as a roommate, a legacy of C4, but most important, as a sister of Christ.

We've got a lot of memories to build together.

Love, MJ

MEET C4

2008-09-07T23:01:00.010-04:00

There's a saying that goes something like: "I came to college to find friends...but I came back with sisters."

I never thought that saying would hold so true-I don't have a sister and I'm not even in a sorority! Yet, the friendships that I've made with my beautiful roommates have proven truth beyond what I first believed about the above statement.

We call ourselves "C4."

You see, for the past two years, we've lived in the Albright on-campus apartments, known as the "Woods" for its somewhat-distant "woodsy" atmosphere away from main campus. We believe (only slightly biased, of course) that our apartment's number-C4-is the absolute most phenomenal location of the Woods. Closest to the "path" that winds to campus and the laundry room facility, we've got a prime balcony spot open to the other apartment complexes and some of the best neighbors around. We love our "C4" title and we flaunt it! We've got a HUGE homemade C4 banner, roommate pictures, and our own theme song!

In reality though, it's not the "C4" name that we love.

The reason why C4 has become such an affectionate name in my vocabulary is because of the wonderful women living in C4 that have become such an influential part of my life. These girls have become, as quoted, not only friends, but sisters, and someday, future bridesmaids.

I want to take the next few posts to introduce you to three young women who embody the splendor of true friendship. I hope that through this "C4 Series," you'll catch a glimpse at some of the most inspiring, Godly women I know. They've changed my life-and forever will be close to my heart. Nadine, Teira, and Sarah, this series is for you.

A Good Feeling

2008-09-04T00:42:00.002-04:00

And I thought I was getting away from CCV with school!

Let me explain.

Really, what I mean is-that it's funny how God can prepare us for certain seasons in our lives by the experiences that He allows us to have.

You see, this entire summer, I worked with a staff that organized youth group services for both junior high and high school teenagers-about 150-200 of them to be exact. Each service was planned to the "T." From a welcome to worship to the message and a closing, each person involved had a role, knew their role, and as a team, we practiced our roles.

Last Sunday, August 31st, I said "goodbye" to my summer internship. However, what I quickly realized tonight-at my college's Intervarsity Christian Fellowship meeting-was that I'm NOT escaping the "oh-so familiar service format."

You see, for one of the FIRST TIMES EVER, "ACF" (Albright Christian Fellowship-Intervarsity Fellowship) held a meeting that contained ALL of the above elements-in an organized way! It was exciting to see God work as leaders set up the projector, ran through the powerpoint slides, hosted the night, presented the message, and teamed up to take "ownership" of sign-up lists and handouts! Best of all-as we promised our members-our meeting took no more than an hour-we were there from 8pm-9pm! I love being able to keep within the time allotment for the respect of the members that the organization cares for.

No, CCV style has yet to leave me. (Quite frankly, I don't think it EVER will.) I've learned a lot from my internship this summer-and I can't wait to continue to apply the things that I've learned to expand the ministry on Albright's campus.

God's got a crazy way of making things work.
What an encouraging night!

When is enough ENOUGH?

2008-09-02T00:37:00.003-04:00

It is entirely too easy to allow one's self to become tied up in the phenomenon of doing.

As I was wrapping up my night tonight (yes, it's about 1am now-ignore the posting time, it's wrong), I was thinking about how I wish I didn't always find myself "doing work" until late-or early-hours into the morning.

I mean, one would think, that with only three classes and a handful of extra-curricular organizations that a young girl would NOT need to be up until 1am doing work!

I believe, my problem is, that I don't know when to stop. I could easily have stopped doing work when I returned from the gym this evening at 9:30pm. I could have easily decided to spend time with my roommates, watching TV, knowing that I have only one class at 1pm tomorrow and have plenty of time beforehand to complete work, yet-I made a different choice.

Instead, I chose to spend an hour or so working on the proposal of a senior thesis. I spent time sending emails, making phone calls, organizing my planner, reading for class, etc, etc, etc, until I find that I'm sitting here at 1am STILL wondering of what I can complete before I am too tired that I can only pass out when permitting my head to hit the pillow.

When is enough enough?

One of my frustrations about the school year is the notion of knowing that "there will always be more work that I can do." Whether it be readings, papers, preparing for tests, organizing my schedule, re-organizing my schedule-I always will have "busy work" that can consume my time-up to 1am and beyond! What I'm beginning to realize is that just because I'll always have work that can last me up until this late hour doesn't mean I have to try and fill those time slots with work. In fact, I'd prefer not too. (Isn't it ironic how we discover these realizations in our senior year?)

During orientation, I heard a speaker talk about the importance of time management. In her lecture, the speaker talked about "Joe," a football player who was perceived to "always be out" every evening. In fact, he was out so much that when he made the Dean's List his first semester, his friends asked him how he managed to hack the computer files to change his grades (disbelieving that he ever studied). To his friends' surprise, Joe shared how he spent the sporadic hours that he had in the morning and throughout his day to complete his work so that he could spend time hanging out with friends in the evening.

Brilliant.

I want to be just like Joe.

Knowing that this semester is one of the last chances that I have to truly work on the friendships that I've been blessed with here at Albright, I want to take as many opportunities as possible to meet my friends where they're at and share life with them. I don't want my evenings to be consumed with school-work, but with conversations and memories of individuals who matter far more greatly than do grades on a paper.

That's a harder reality to swallow than it is to type. You see, my aspiration to be like Joe isn't about the importance of time-management, it's about the reality of prioritizing work verses people.

Am I more passionate about serving my school-work?

Or am I more passionate about serving people?

I know my answer.

I pray that now, I can show it.

Watch out Joe, you're not the only one who plans to be out this semester while making the Dean's List. :)

I'm alive, I promise!

2008-08-31T12:10:00.007-04:00

I bet you all thought that I was giving up on this blog-posting, hunh?

Truth be told, I've had a pretty hard last few weeks.

With little time to myself, a maximum number of transitions, and the felt pressure to emotionally disconnect with people from one environment so that I can mentally prepare myself to reconnect with people from another environment, I've become ignorant to my blogger reputation.

I wish I hadn't.

For the past few weeks, as I've been wrapping up my internship at Christ's Church of the Valley, as I've dove head-deep into my final year of orientation at Albright College, and as I've moved myself and my roommates into my on-campus apartment for my year, I've spotted myself quickly-and easily-confessing that "I don't have time to blog."

But honestly, who really has time to blog?

If it's not transitioning from an internship or moving back into school, it'll be starting a new job or finding ways to restructure my schedule to fit the needs of my family in the future. It's easy to excuse one's self for "not having time" with the hustle and bustle of college living, however, it's not the "college living" that restricts my time-it's ANYTHING! I'm always going to have to learn to deal with the difficulty of time management.

That includes holding myself accountable for the responsibilities that weave within those different transitions.

So, I'm making a re-commitment to blog. Knowing the time that is necessary to transition into my "school mode," I do not foresee my blogging activity exceeding a few (perhaps two?) times a week. However, also knowing that its a great way to keep in contact with family and friends (as well as to network), I hope that I can increase my goal before the end of the semester.

Although the topics may shift a big (a little less about ministry and a little more about the anxieties of juggling college-living), I'm excited about the ways in which I can continue to reflect upon my growth as as individual through this writing opportunity.

Won't you join me (again) in this adventure?

I look forward to posting again soon!